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From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…

"Hey, love yer sig…"

Every now and agin' C&J drops in on random posts in search of pithy signature lines---aka the links, quotes, or other words of wisdom that some Kossacks add to the bottom of their comments. (You can create your own "sig" at your user profile page). It's fun because it gives me a chance to explore posts I might not otherwise pop in on. Here are some "sig"nificant (Ha! Wordplay! Where's mah Pulitzer?) brain candy from you, the unwashed but well-coiffed orange rabble:

I don't mind if you're straight. Just don't flaunt it in public. (Chrisove)

I can think of no more stirring symbol of man's humanity to man than a fire engine. -- Kurt Vonnegut (SteelerGrrl)

Sig line graphic
There are, in every age, new errors to be rectified, and new prejudices to be opposed. ~Samuel Johnson  (slksfca)

Lanza's mom had..an ar-15...Glock 20...Sig 9mm...nine full 30 round ammo clips...my mom has..cookies. (Arrow)

You can safely assume you have created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do. --Anne Lamott (zooecium)

Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us.
~Jerry Garcia (DeadHead)

Minority rights should never be subject to majority vote. (lostboyjim)

The modern conservative is engaged in one of man's oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness. -- John Kenneth Galbraith (richardak)

Give blood. Play hockey. (flycaster)

liberal bias = failure to validate or sufficiently flatter the conservative narrative on any given subject (RockyMtnLib)

And from maxschell:
Send your old shoes to the new George W. Bush library.
As always, we bow to your superior sigging ability.

Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]

Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Note: If you see a SWAT team with chapped lips, do not run up to them with a cannister in your hand while yelling "I have a balm!!!"  A public service message from the Department of Premature Demise Prevention.

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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Iron Man 3: 10
Days 'til the start of Petaluma Butter and Eggs Day: 4
(Hat tip to Thinking Fella for the link)
Split of men and women, respectively, who had a drivers license in 1991: 51.3% / 48.7%
Split of men and women, respectively, who had a drivers license in 2011: 49.5% / 50.5%
(Source: Federal Highway Administration)
Percent of the male population that is colorblind: 7%
Percent of color blindness-related errors that involve red and green: 95%
(Source: Details)
Percent chance that top executives in the fossil fuel industry gave a damn that yesterday was Earth Day: 0%

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Tuesday Words of Wisdom from the Right-wing Blogosphere:

Liberals are using the dictionary against the rest of us.  It needs to stop.
---Commenter Ohistorian at RedState
All together now: 1…2…3… Antidisestablishmentarianism!!!

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Puppy Pic of the Day:  Pootie adopts a woozle

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Judge Judy screen grab
"You're a moron! There's
something wrong with you!"
CHEERS to our good old-fashioned justice system.  Here's today's civics lesson, kids: if you're an American teenage citizen dressed like an American teenage slacker, you are not the equivalent of a non-American citizen dressed in the uniform of a foreign country's military.  Thus the Republican hawks haz a sad today because the surviving member of the  carnage-happy Brothers Karamoron won't be tried as an "enemy combatant."  Instead, based on what I read in the transcript of the reading-of-the-charges at Dzhokhar Tsarnaev's bedside yesterday, he'll be tried as---pardon my Latin textbook legalese, but I like to be as precise as possible---a murderous idiot with an acute case of brother worship and brain rot.  Or, if you want the abbreviated version, just bend down and drag your knuckles on the ground.

JEERS to weapons of mass neglect.  Meanwhile, down in West, Texas (conveniently located in east Texas), residents are recovering from a giant fertilizer plant explosion that registered "WTF" on the Richter Scale.  This is what austerity and fealty to capitalism-above-safety gets ya:

There were no sprinklers. No firewalls. No water deluge systems. Safety inspections were rare at the fertilizer company in West, Texas, that exploded and killed at least 14 people this week.

This is not unusual.

The facility's safety plan said that there was no risk of a fire or explosion occuring at the plant.  Management would love to show it to you, but it got incinerated in the fire and explosion at the plant.  In the words of the state's illustrious governor, who is now begging for aid (which he should get) from the tyrannical federal government: "Can't. Sorry. Oops."

CHEERS to "Ten-Cent Jimmy."  Happy 222nd Birthday to that old stuffed shirt James Buchanan.  In practice, he was a dud as president.  But on paper, his resume was pretty impressive:

President James Buchanan
True Fact: Buchanan
invented the fauxhawk.
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• United States Minister to the United Kingdom
• 17th United States Secretary of State
• United States Senator from Pennsylvania
• United States Minister to Russia
• Member of the U.S. House of Representatives (PA-04: 4 terms)
• Member of the U.S. House of Representatives (PA-03: 1 term)
• Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee
We're getting the 15th POTUS our usual gifts: an extension of his elevation in rank among Worst Presidents Ever from #2 to #3, leaving Harding in the runner-up spot and You-Know-HehHehHeh-Who dead last.  Also the usual "I Diddled While the Country Teetered on the Brink of Civil War and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt" t-shirt.

CHEERS to gardens of Eden: outer space edition.  A NASA telescope has spotted a trio of planets that are in the so-called "habitable zone."  They're pristine, their climate is just right, and the lands and seas haven't been ravaged by the fossil fuel industry and unfettered industrialization.  Said the Koch brothers: "That's okay---we can fix that."

Airline no-smoking sign
A bygone era.
JEERS to getting emphysema at 35,000 feet.  Can you believe there was a time when smoking was allowed on commercial airlines?  I still remember traveling with my parents and having to sit at the back of the plane because my mom dragged on King-size Kents (when I was born the first thing I did was blow smoke rings).  What were we THINKING??!  Thankfully the movement to ban airborne puffery went into effect 25 years ago today.  So now all we have to worry about is catching an exotic disease from the passenger two rows back that causes instant diarrhea and gruesome facial disfigurement.  But you'll have the pinkest lungs!

JEERS to the Titanic of marketing plans.  Twenty three years ago today, the geniuses in Atlanta foisted New Coke onto the nation.  The response was...um...flat.

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Five years ago in C&J: April 23, 2008

CHEERS to the wisdom of John and Jane Q. Public.  Talk about living in historic times.  President Bush is now---and shall forever be---the least-liked president ever.  If you don’t count the few weeks in 1910 when William Howard Taft's popularity dropped to twelve percent after he accidentally sat on a basket of puppies.

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And just one more…

Americablog's logo
Happy Blogiversary--
9 years and counting.
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CHEERS to the red, white & blue hypocrite slayers.  Be sure to stop by Americablog today as it celebrates its 9th blogiversary.  Founder John Aravosis started out with the highly-effective campaign to Stop Dr. Laura and went on to expose fake White House "reporter" Jeff Gannon/James Guckert's prostitution past and other Republican- and corporation-fueled shenanigans.  Plus their spin-off site, Americablog Gay, is of course fab-o. (Two snaps and a twist to Portland native Joe Sudbay, who runs it.)  Americablog is kind of a cross between the snarky brevity of Atrios and the lengthier posts of DKos.  It's one of C&J's must-read blogs---we had them bookmarked from the beginning---and we wish them many more years in the pursuit of truth, justice and Americanwayishness.

Oh, and happy birthday, Bill Shakespeare.  Nice tights.  Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?

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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:

An Associated Press photograph taken before the signing shows a page of notes about the bill on Brownback's desk that included a handwritten message at the top: "JESUS + Bill in Portland Maine."  Further down the page were typewritten notes spelling out Brownback's belief that the bill would create "a culture of Cheers and Jeers."
---The Topeka Capital-Journal
4/22/13

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Poll

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