I debated on whether or not I should write anything about this article, considering the interesting and informative points made in Wednesday's Open Thread for Night Owls: "First, Don't Attack Weak Arguments." I thought it was really informative, including the Chait article and saved it in my favorites folder. Considering the amount of stupid that has been going on, illustrated by jpmassar's collection of the front page headlines... and considering that I'm kinda cranky today for a variety of reasons, I've decided to bring up this article by Salon: Ridiculous Fox News Claim of the Day: Reason Caused the Holocaust.
Instead of attacking this weak argument, I think I'm just going to mock it. Right Wing Watch has Penny Nance in their archives. I didn't know what "Concerned Women for America" actually was, though could take a guess. It was created by Beverly LeHaye, wife of "Left Behind" (ironic title is ironic) series author Tim LeHaye. It's a conservative Christian group gallantly fighting against everything that isn't it - thus comes to the crux of my reasons for writing a diary.
For serious reasons, I've had somewhat of an argument/discussion with my best friend about religion in general. The difficulty I am running into is whether or not I think doing without religion entirely is a good thing or not. She argues it is not. She is incredibly intelligent. She's a Presbyterian, but from the "liberal" branch of the church. I grew up in the painfully extreme conservative branch of the church and it has made me whatever it is I am today: an atheist? Certainly a skeptic at the least. It feels like every time we turn around something is being said to this extent or something equally stupid. I hear it from my dad all the time; regurgitation of Fox News and Rush Limbaugh talking points. What I never fully realized is that the church I belonged to, essentially, is a cult. I'm thankful I got out of it. As an aside, she told me that her church in general pretty much "chuckles" at churches like the one I belonged to and my family still belongs to. That made me angry, but I'm digressing.
"Chuckling" at this stuff is probably the best thing to do in terms of mental health. As for trying to get anything meaningful done - reasonable legislation (gasp!) and whatnot, it probably doesn't help, but I'm not sure ignoring it helps either. Part of me wonders what would have happened if the liberal branch of the church didn't chuckle and ignore this conservative side when it started fearmongering and spewing incredibly regressive things.
But in any case, for the sake of our mental health and to get the cobwebs out of my brain while trying to remember my Elizabethan English... in special tribute to Michele Bachmann's Shakespeare quote blunder, I will respond in Elizabethan English to this article in full mockery because I think it's a layered appropriate response. Read with appropriate British accent as you see fit.
(My idea came from a discussion with another friend this morning over perhaps the most idiotic reason we've heard for not granting equal marriage rights to homosexuals: "because it's icky." That answer, I decided, deserved to be insulted in the best way possible: Shakespearean English. Because it's creative and amuses me. So, Ms. Penny Nance...)
Blamest thou Reason for the Holocaust? In sooth? Prithee, quiet thy tongue and shut thy trap, for from its depths spews forth a most foul and unholy miasma worthy to be named mother of the Thames! Irony layers itself like unto an onion, rotted and stinking impishly as it blooms, revealing itself to all unfairly subjected to it's rank perfume. Knowest thou must be paid handsomely by thy unwitting unfotunates, yearning and some e'en frothing for REASON to aid in understanding why Sir Foxx, aptly named for thou clearest think he sly as Ole Scratch himself, would decree a day of Reason to stand beside Prayer? Dost thou knowest they words sliding from thy tongue take form as only goodly Kevin Smith's Dogma could fathom: a golgothan? Taketh thy excremental and shuffle thither back to thy cave or rock thou hast slithered from under and remain. I pray thee, get thee gone. Thy silence wouldst do well to save the world from further pollution filling our ears, our lungs and our hearts. Fie on thee, madam. Dark times hath long sunk their vampired teeth into humanity's flesh, but not for or by Reason. Lady, thou art no siren that shall seduce my ear to abandon Reason for thy shyte demon. Begone!
And to thee, Fox News' slattern whose name I doth not remember - to thee, I sayest take thy sniveling comment thou spake at video's end and shove it up thy lily-livered rear end. Nay, no non-praying skeptic - heathen unto thy ear forsooth - needst thy unsoliticted advice to simply pray not on the day of National Prayer. Thank thee, sirrah, for such snark passed for Reason when Reason be the thing thou hast mocked and mocketh with an excremental summoning witch, the Madam Nance. Thy viewers surely snickered and agreed, "Oh yea, he doth make such good sense! It standeth to reason that heathens shall not pray upon a day of prayer. Nay, the evil creatures preyeth upon a day of prayer!" Sadly, I hath not met many that may wield vocabulary in such a clever way and so bestowest upon them, here, a courtesy still whilest they prey upon Reason. Hither further the putrid onion unfurls it's browned petals. Begone, ye cowardly and wretched asshat, as well with the lady witch and besmirch Reason no longer!
((Apologies. I don't think my grammar is quite on, as it's been a long time since I've used my once vast vocabulary of the times. ^_^ ))