Sen. Lindsey Graham has pleaded to give military powers to the President for a full scale invasion of Jihadistan
"We will never surrender, we will never stop this war!" Lindsey screamed "there can be no peace, not now, not ever" he decried to the uproar of prerecorded cheering. "USA, USA, USA, we will invade Jihadistan; as soon as we can find it" he wailed.
He called for the third and sixth fleets to be sent to find Jihadistan and to never return until they found it. "We must keep the nuclear option open" he said spittle forming on his lips. "The citizens of Jihadistan must know that the US is serious, we will not stop until there is no Jihadi left in Jihadistan" he was then lead away by several aids to a small white van.
Michele Bachmann has sent a number of aids to the center of DC to give a message to the Jihadistan Ambassador stating "until you pray to American Jesus we are at war!". Several aids were interviewed at a local coffee shop "don't worry we will just demand that we are paid, then say we delivered the message, no problem" they affirmed.
Glen Beck has launched several tirades against the Jihadis saying they should remove the black helicopters circling his lawn immediately.
Alex Jones has declared Jihadistan is a secret Obama plot to impurify his bodily fluids, he then gnawed off his own foot and blamed the CIA for the consequent infection.
Louie Gohmert declared that Jihadis were evil; but totally right when it came to subjugating women.
Steve King wants to build a wall between Jihadistan and the US; just as soon as it was found.
John McCain was found weeping in a darkened room in the capital and issued the following statement "I don't think I can take anymore good news".
Bob Dole declared "dear god, can we please have a mulligan?"