So this is perhaps the most hilarious bit of crazy you'll see today: a Wall Street Journal editorial board member ranting about evil bicycles because, well, here is the argument:
- The bike share program was rolled out so that New Yorkers could feel like they were in London and Paris.
- A cyclist was hit by an SUV.
- Don't ask her to "enter the minds of totalitarians running this government".
- She—a conservative right-wing nutbag—represents the majority of New Yorkers who somehow vote differently than she does.
- She knows that all New Yorkers are appalled by the bike share program, because she's obviously down with the people and they all think alike and have a mind meld.
- People who don't live in New York should envision what happens in autocracies which renders people helpless—it means bicycles desecrating streets. Actually, "begrimed is the word".
- It is shocking how these bikes were "infiltrated" into the city, by smugglers apparently.
- They are a fire hazard because fire trucks can't drive into subway stations. Yes, that's a real argument. Me, I thought the staircases were keeping the trucks out.
- Moderator notes that no pedestrians have been killed by bikes, but 597 have been hit by cars and trucks. WSJ hack says that "every citizen knew" that the biggest danger in the city are bikes, because they veer in and out of stuff. Veering is so much worse than killing.
- The mayor is a "practiced denier" because he doesn't stand in the streets of New York.
- Tourists are using the bikes!
- If Bloomberg had guts, he wouldn't have formed a blue ribbon commission to "study" the issue. Because nothing says "leadership" like studies.
- New York is helpless in the face of Bloomberg's evil, if only they could do something like not elect him over and over again.
- New York is not London or Paris, and they'll keep it that way! Thank heavens. Because London and Paris are total dumps.
Phew!