GUS (Gave Up Smoking) is a community support diary for Kossacks in the midst of quitting smoking. Any supportive comments, suggestions or positive distractions are appreciated. If you are quitting or even just thinking of quitting, please join us! We kindly ask that politics be left out.
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Pity me, GUS people. For the better part of today, I was under the mistaken impression it was Tuesday.
It was not, in fact, Tuesday. Tuesday was yesterday.
How this didn't register with me, I'm not sure. I didn't feel great on Monday, but I did go to work, and did all the other stuff I do on a normal workday. And I went to work yesterday too, so that wasn't it. Senior moment? Brain fart? Late-onset ADHD? Who knows?
The good news? It's Wednesday, and tomorrow's a federal holiday, and since I took the day after that off, it's also Friday for me. I don't take a lot of time off, so a long weekend is very, very welcome. Long weekend, bitches! Whoooooooooo!
Ahem.
Okay, the down side? I didn't budget much time for this GUS diary. I'd actually mapped out a plan where I was going to write this on Tuesday so I could run a couple of errands Wednesday after work, and still be home to host. Which would have been an awesome plan, had it in fact been Tuesday today. Which, as we have already established, it is not.
So I had to ditch the perfectly good theme I had lined up (because it would have taken a long time to write) and go with Plan B. What was my Plan B? Riff on the theme of independence, since tomorrow's the 4th of July and---well, you know where this is going. I do not anticipate points for originality. And yet it kind of makes sense. Of all the holidays, there are a couple that speak to those of us who might be trying to change behaviors (or more specifically, change addictive behavior).
One of them is New Year's Day, our annual Reset Button, our officially sanctioned Fresh Start. We get that wonderful blank slate we crave and a lot of company on our journey. New Year's Day is a biggie.
The other is Independence Day: America's annual fabulous explodey Salute to Freedoms (TM), and all that implies. No, not the Mardi Gras-style "let it all hang out" kind of freedom, but rather the breaking of ties that bind you to something you've outgrown, a day to celebrate self-determination and charting a new, untested course. Freedom can be a truly wonderful thing.
It's also kind of scary. Societies develop rules for a reason; most people like the security of at least a few agreed-upon guidelines. They like a little structure; it's comforting.
Of course too much structure and things quickly go from "comforting" to "restrictive and stifling." If it's imposed on us all at once we generally react just as swiftly and vocally, and push right back. But it usually happens in a more gradual, stealthy way...restrictions creeping up on us, so slowly we don't always know that it's happening.
Being caught up in an addictive cycle is all about restrictions big and small, governing everything from how long you can comfortably go between hits to where you can partake and how much else in your life has to change to accommodate it (for example, juggling a budget to find funds to pay for it, or rearranging your work and social schedule to ensure things continue uninterrupted, or placating unhappy family and friends).
The worst part about the nature of addiction is that we're likely to justify these restrictions as a reasonable trade-off. We don't always allow ourselves to acknowledge how restrictive it is, how it grabs your brain and shakes it every few minutes until it gets what it wants. You feel like you don't have a say in things.
That's why leaving addiction behind is so freeing. Once the temporary unpleasantness of the active quitting process is past, you are untethered from the addictive grind, free to set your own day-to-day timetable, make your own rules, and live a life that isn't centered on where your next hit is coming from. Declaring your independence from that whole cycle is most definitely something to celebrate.
Who's Your Little Buddy?
1BQ, 2thanks, 3rdGenFeminist, 417els, A Man Called Gloom, Abra Crabcakeya, Actbriniel, addisnana, AfroPonix, aishmael, Alise, Alpha99, also mom of 5, ambeeeant, American in Kathmandu, amk for obama, andsarahtoo, angry marmot, Anne933, anodnhajo, aoeu, AoT, aquarius2001, arcadesproject, Archie2227, arodb, Arthur Wolf (in memoriam), assyrian64, Aunt Acid, awkawk, b4uknowit, BadKitties, bamablue, BARAKABETH, barnowl, b barrie, bdizz, beatpanda, beefydaddy18, betterdemsonly, BFSkinner, bgblcklab1, BigAlinWashSt, Bike Crash, BirderWitch, BJKay, bleeding heart, blingbling65, blue husky, Blue Intrigue, bluedust, BluejayRN, BlueJessamine, Bluerall, bluestatedem84, BoiseBlue, boudi08, Brahman Colorado, breedlovinit, BrenP, BrianParker14, Bronxist, broths, BrowniesAreGood, bsmechanic, buddabelly, Bugsydarlin, bumbi, BusyinCA, cactusgal, cagernant, Carol in San Antonio, CathiefromCanada, CathodeRay, CDH in Brooklyn, Cedwyn, cee4, Cen Den, ChocolateChris, ChurchofBruce, ciganka, cinnamondog, citizenx, ClapClapSnap, claude, Cleante, Code Monkey, codobus, Coldblue Steele, Colorado is the Shiznit, coloradomomma, common green, commonmass, Common Sense Mainer, congenitalefty, coppercelt, dadanation, Damnit Janet, dangoch, DarienComp, dauber, Dauphin, Dave in AZ, Dave in Northridge, David54, deedogg, demkat620, Dexter, Diana in NoVa, Dickie, DiegoUK, Dingodude, dirtdude, distraught, djMikulec, docreed2003, dolfin66, donnamarie, Donna O, dotsright, Dr Teeth, Dreggas, DRo, droogie6655321, Dube, duckhunter, Eclectablog, Eddie C, EdgedInBlue, effervescent, elbamash, El barragas, el vasco, electricgrendel, entrelac, ericlewis0, Everest42, Ex Con, ezdidit, fauve, fhamme, Fineena, fiona2, fishhawk, Flea, flumptytail, Friend of the court, fritzi56, FrugalGranny, Garrett, Gator, gchaucer2, GDbot, Geiiga, GenXangster, glpaul, gooderservice, gooners, gravlax, GreenMountainBoy02 (in memoriam), greylox, grndrush (in memoriam), GrumpyWarriorPoet, GuerillaLiberal, GulfExpat, gzodik, Haole in 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