Skip to main content

1 – You should always inflate your own ego by pretending that your leftist ideology is just so intellectually advanced, complex and non-jingoistic. You must do this despite the fact that you actually have an extremely simplistic and biased ideology which consists of nothing more than blind dissent (usually directed at the US or Israel,) third world white guilt and a completely phony sense of self-righteousness.

2 – You must be relentlessly mindful not to dare offend any Muslim, any minority or any impoverished nation by making a generalization about their culture and you must swiftly denounce those that do. You may however freely make generalizations about Christians, Israelis, Republicans, the US military or the American people.

3 – You must constantly denounce the oppressive and exploitative capitalist economic system of the US while at the same time praising and defending socialist systems abroad. This is always most effectively done while either living in a capitalist country or living in a country that heavily relies on a capitalist country to be the engine for the global economy.

4 – Any form of patriotism in regards to the US must be looked upon with scorn, suspicion, cynicism and be followed by ridicule. Any form of dissent against America is automatically valid, noble, progressively enlightened and beyond any and all reproach.

5 – Every sovereign nation in the world has a right to secure its border with the exception of the United States of America. The borders of the US must remain completely free and open and anything less than this demand must be met with cries of xenophobia and/or racism.

6 – Any person who is darkskinned and from an impoverished nation is automatically either a victim of US imperialism or a victim of exploitation by multi-national US corporations. Any criticism for any violence they commit must immediately be blamed on either Israel or a western country, (preferably the United States.)

7 - You should always scoff and be completely dismissive whenever anyone makes any claims in regards to the leftwing media and its liberal bias. Meanwhile you must always instantly recognize and denounce the rightwing media and its conservative bias.

8 – If the US supports a dictator or an oppressive government you must immediately denounce the US for doing so. Meanwhile if the US sanctions or assists in a rebellion against a dictator or an oppressive government you must then denounce the US for destroying that country’s economy or starving/killing the people of that nation.

9 - You must pretend that it’s possible for the military to fight a brutal insurgency that’s indistinguishable from civilians without incurring any loss of civilian life. In addition you must make no distinction between nations, organizations and individuals that kill or injure civilians in order to fight oppression and nations, organizations and individuals that deliberately kill or injure civilians for no other purpose other than to cause havoc or impose oppression.

10 – You should consistently blame western nations for the hatred of Muslim extremists while conveniently ignoring that these extremists by their own admission are completely intolerant against other religions, gays, women and any form of freedom of expression that differs from their own. You must also ignore the fact that the extremists have repeatedly proven that they’re more than willing to lash out violently over the most ridiculous reasons (i.e. Danish cartoons that offend them) and that they’re absolutely incapable of getting along with anyone else including moderate Muslims within their own various nations.

11 – Any discussion, analysis or criticism of the US or Israel (no matter how redudant and inflammatory) should be completely immune from ever being labeled as “anti-American” or “anti-semitism.” Meanwhile any discussion, analysis or criticism of Muslim extremism, illegal immigration or the culture of any third world nation must be immediately labeled as Islamophobia, bigotry, xenophobia, or racism.

12 – Any foreign nation or foreign leader with a poor human rights record that was ever friendly to the US must be harshly criticised. Meanwhile any foreign nation or foreign leader with a poor human rights record that was ever hostile towards the US must be defended and have their poor human rights record either deflected, downplayed or outright ignored.

13 – In order to undermine the US during a time of war, any abuse by the US military (whether intentional or not) must be immediately and relentlessly harped on over and over and over and over ad nauseam in order to try and make the exception seem like the rule. Meanwhile far more widespread abuses by insurgents, terrorists or any other anti-US group must be simply ignored or in some cases be praised as justified. When confronted about this bias, simply lie and pretend that you’re not trying to undermine anything; pretend that you’re merely motivated by a benevolent desire that “America be held to a higher standard.”

14 – You should fixate only on the most negative aspects of US history and contemperary American foreign and domestic policy. You must then use this as a foundation in order to try to laughably equate the US to same moral level as every oppressive and brutal regime and organization throughout the world which oppresses and murders their own people by regular policy.

15 – Whenever anyone criticizes Islam you must instantly deflect the criticism away from Islam and over to Christianity because criticizing Christianity is the height of progressive wisdom while criticizing Islam is bigotry/hate speech. In addition, you should always either fixate on the negatives of contemperary Christianity or harp on ancient events like the Inquisition, the Crusades, the Salem Witch Trials in an effort to pretend that modern Christian intolerance and violence is the same as modern Islamic intolerance and violence.

16 – You should always fiercely resist ever criticising the human rights records or policies of oppressive nations or organizations whenever they have poor relations or any kind of conflict with the US or Israel. All such criticism must be either completely absent, downplayed or be immediately deflected to the US or a US ally.

17 – If a Muslim extremist commits an act of terror you must immediately begin claiming that it was an isolated act of provoked violence that should be blamed on another country’s foriegn policy. Meanwhile if a US soldier, Israeli soldier or Christian extremist commits an act of terror you must instantly denounce the crazed, bloodthirsty, hate-filled brute and demand immediate prosecution to the full extent of the law.

18 – Always remember that nothing infuriates you more than seeing any American celebrating anything about their country (particularly when it’s any victory by the US military.) All such displays of unbridled patriotism must be immediately countered with some form of scorn or denouncement.

19 – Whenever the US or Israel have any kind of conflict with any nation or terrorist organization you must instantly bendover backwards to come up with creative fabrications as to how the US or Israel provoked said conflict. This must be done regardless of how oppressive, intolerant, aggressive or brutal the opposition in that conflict actually is.

20 – No matter how many times a far left rule is validated you must instantly race in to criticize the far left rules list. For years you have convinced yourself that your leftist ideology is just so advanced and evolved and it’s a very emotional experience for you to finally discover that your ideology is just as consumed with biases and double standards as the people that you’ve always pretended to be superior to.

EMAIL TO A FRIEND X
Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags

?

More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site