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Maybe there really were mischievous talking snakes convincing people to eat apples and we just bread them out of existence.

The only thing keeping me from soaring up to Heaven is this rotten gravity that keeps sucking me against the Earth. Stupid gravity.

"When Alexander the Great saw the breadth of his domain, he wept for there were no more hot singles in his area to conquer."

"Rand Paul" is my least favorite of all the Jelly Belly flavors.

Do Great Things! Regardless of the fact that they will be irrelevant and forgotten in the near future if not immediately!

Lift yourself above the mundane by sitting on the roof a lot. Bonus: you can jump off when you get tired of people.

To live the best life, simply drink lots of flavored water and eat animal and vegetable protein. Also punch a motherfucker now & then.



Speak softly, but carry a big stick to beat people with so later witnesses will be all like, "but s/he was so soft-spoken."

51%16 votes
19%6 votes
29%9 votes

| 31 votes | Vote | Results

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