For the full story, feel free to visit the Seattle Free Press:
Alright, so the mayor and I haven’t gotten off on the right foot it would appear. Today I was minding my business, watching the A’s beat the Tigers (!!) by myself down at the Tribune Tavern (ok, it’s a yuppy bar but the servers are nice, and there are tv’s…) when I stepped outside for a phone call. I noticed Mayor Quan and another gentleman were in the bar also, and about to leave. Of course I made a snarky comment under my breath as she walked past me….I figured she’s used to it by now and would just ignore it. Or she wouldn’t have heard it…. either way I wasn’t really trying to get her attention. Oh, how wrong I was.
They both stopped, turned around and started yelling at me, saying I should get a job and I probably don’t even live here (fair enough….) and that I should stop breaking their windows (huh?). They got up in my face, Jean Quan grabbed my shoulder (she really seems to like doing that), I backed away and told her not to grab me, and at that point the very tall dude she was with smacked the hat off my head (ironically an Oakland A’s hat…guess he’s a Tigers fan?), and then proceeded to forcibly shove me down, into a parked car and into the street. As I got up, the Mayor rushed him into the office building (the tribune building); I’m assuming she realized how scandalous this all could be. To my surprise, the security guards to the building then accosted ME (yeah, the guy who had just been assaulted for mildly criticizing the mayor) and ordered me to leave. But I still hadn’t finished my french fries, so I went back into the restaurant, awkwardly, thinking it was over. Again, wrong.
The dude comes back in, gets in my face as I’m sitting at the bar, and I asked if he was going to hit me again. He said “I didn’t hit you. If I had hit you, you’d be in the gutter face down right now.” He said he had called the cops, and I asked how he would explain the fact that he just assaulted someone for no reason to the police. He said “you think they’re going to believe you? The mayor will testify against you, and you’ll fucking lose.” (I’m sorry, I forgot to explain that this man is actually a real-life movie villain). He said I had no right to insult the mayor. We argued about that point for a second, then he looked to the manager and said “get this guy out of here.” I laughed, thinking it was a joke. I looked to the staff, most of whom I’m on friendly terms with at this point, and they looked generally confused and conflicted. They apologized to me profusely, but said “hey look, this guy owns the building and there’s nothing we can do.” WHAT?! Yup, Tom Henderson, owner of the Oakland Tribune building and (apparently) Mayor Quan’s “muscle.” Side note: what the hell does the Mayor do all day? The only times I’ve ever seen her in public was a.) today, having her friend assault me, b.) at the A’s rally last week, and c.) showing up uninvited to the fastfood workers strike. Damn, must be nice. I might have to re-think this anarchy thing.
The upside is I think I made some new friends at the bar. To make matters even weirder though, as I was leaving, Tom Henderson tried mocking me…”what, you running away?” Uhh, dude, you had me kicked out of YOUR bar. Fucking rich people..
Seriously though, go A’s.
For the full story, feel free to visit the Seattle Free Press: