There are people on Kos who come to their progressive ends because of their parents and families. There are people who understood they were Democrats because of everyone around them. I am going to tell a different story: I became a progressive after being a long time die hard conservative. In fact, I wasn't just conservative.. I was a very politically active one - yep, that's right. I designed the data and voter efforts for more then a dozen Kansas Republican candidates from 1997-2001. I worked website design and development for candidates who if I said their names people on this site would be forced to run outside, spit on the ground and run in circles to get rid of the bad mojo.
Everytime I hear someone say "you can't change someone's mind", I think: what a load of bunk. I know. I've been there.
During my high school years, Kansas was conservative - and so was I. I had a chance to meet, talk to and even debate with some of the leading politicians in our state. I had met Bob Dole more then once, dealt with Nancy Kassebaum, and I came to know many of our house of representatives.
It was a meeting with Bob Dole that cemented me as a hardened Republican. Discussing the Americans with Disabilities Act, Dole explained that the legislation was amongst the most conservative imaginable in his mind (and mine at the time) it meant that people previously shut out of the system would have a chance to work and participate, pay taxes and benefit society.
It was a profound statement of all of the things I believed in: a government that governed to get out of the way of the people and provide them a chance to succeed. I liked it. I bought into it.
And through all of it, I met and worked with quite a few conservatives and I helped shape policy in my state. When conservative candidates needed digital work, I was always on the call sheet. I had meetings with potential governors. I met with senators. And for quite a while, I was riding high on my work.
There were also things that began to wear on me. When people would ask about my incidence with a mugging, the first words I would hear far too often would be: "black kids?", and I would immediately respond: "no, just a bunch of white hooligans". The first few times it didn't register. The longer it went on, though, the more it hit me.. the deep set thought that the violent crime against me was all the more unthinkable because the perpetrators were white. It was what I would come to think of as a tell of growing up in a racist environment. The fact that the first assumption was that the only people who could commit such a violent crime would be black and that it was more shocking because they were not.
Two years prior, I met many friends I would keep for a lifetime through Tori Amos. I had woken up from a coma, survived the worst moments of my life in rehab listening to her music. Her song, "Flying Dutchman" spoke to my life - and the example of it is the title of my upcoming book (plug plug).
My friends I met through Tori were far more liberal then I was and yet I had no problem communicating with them. They had no problems with my conservative views though they snickered now and again. I spent time that year working with a battered woman's shelter and helping to raise money for RAINN.
And through those experiences, I heard stories that absolutely broke my heart as to what I believed about justice and the role of justice in our society.
I hung tight to my belief: a small government that empowers the people is the solution, and it is what I believe in. In 1999, before her death, I had a meeting with Barbara Olsen here in Kansas City, where the concept of elections and the Clinton presidency was the head of conversation.
I went through several campaigns with conservative candidates. But it was one meeting I think in 2002 that changed took a lot of my nagging problems and made me think: there is something really wrong here.
I sat in a room discussing data design and plans with a prominent Kansas politician.. a name big enough and in the news enough that if I said it he would be immediately identified. I sat and listened to their thoughts on the state of Kansas and their goals for Kansas and I walked out changed. I walked out realizing that most of the things I had believed were not being in any way addressed by Republicans.. who were not for any sort of small, empowering government.. they instead were in favor of a government only to instill and force their viewpoint... big government, our way.
It reminded me of a Mystery Science Theater 3000 quote: "World Peace. But it has to be Our kind of world peace."
I left that meeting and received an offer from a campaign I turned down. I realize this will seem outrageous to some, but seriously.. people who see my LinkedIn see a virtual conservative Who's Who in Kansas. Until 2002, I would be considered a conservative campaign staple, in one way or another, I might find myself getting a phone call.
As time went on, that meeting stuck with me and gnawed at me. Being a former debater and public speaker for years, High School and College (NIET), I liked to argue both sides of the argument, in part because I like to find the strength and weaknesses of an argument and in part because I had early hopes of Debate prep roles with campaigns that wanted me to consider it.
I joined Kos in 2003, and I argued a lot. Both sides of the issues. Not as a troll, but as a chance to find an argument and wade through it and find the strengths and the weaknesses of it. I was unhappy with the direction of US general policy and at the same time unhappy with the Democratic party for making - what I felt - was a very weak sauce attempt at any real 'clash' as we'd call it in debate.
From January 2004 through October 2004, I had a lot of good arguments here. Some good ones. A few bitter ones, but I learned and addressed my grievances. At the time, when I would make arguments I perceived of as the 'right' conservative argument, it was quickly pointed out to me that: that's great, too bad there isn't a single conservative arguing that point at all.
I came to believe that the conservatives in our country were no longer representing a serious ideological viewpoint that had an intellectual response, instead it was a party that was beginning to pray on disinformation and bad ideas.
It wasn't that conservatives had no opportunities for good ideas; it was that conservatives had fallen into a trap of painting all opposition as demonic and therefore any reasoned response to them meant you had to acknowledge that they could have at least some truth to their argument.
That year, I watched Conservatives put forward insane and irrational arguments instead of serious counter proposals and thoughtful dialog. I sat through state and house races for candidates and realized that conservatives were not representing what I believed in as Conservatism in any way.
I left Kos in October, 2004 and finished out with several PACs working their data and management systems.
I sat through a meeting that fall which broke my heart because it seemed to me as though all the conservatives in the room had lost interest in making a case with any merit; instead, the case was a self-centered attack on almost everyone who wasn't them. The failure of Kansas City, "those welfare people" and so on. Everything was the fault of someone else, and they deserved what they got.
I took a step back that winter and re-evaluated. I could stay on the track I was on and I could probably latch on with one of these yucks and keep doing what I was doing or I could do something different.
My oldest Son was 5 years old and we had known for years that he suffered from multiple mental disabilities, amongst them autism. I knew that in order for things to change we needed a reasonable debate on the issues. Just as my mother, a longtime conservative, had managed to point out that the ADA was the right approach, I saw helping the mentally disabled as the smart investment. Invest now in helping the mentally disadvantage and save significantly down the road.
Conservatives, however, no longer saw it this way "it's all hand outs for people.." There would be no discussion of investments and returns, long term costs, advantages and disadvantages. In fact, there could be no debate at all because the ability to listen to reason was out the window.
I rejoined Kos under this current ID (and have not switched since). I sounded out my ideas and even when I disagreed with the community, the Kos and other communities were willing to have a reasoned debate, a discussion of ideas and reason through an argument from different perspectives. It was simply more intellectually honest then the refusal to consider ideas.
As time went on, conservatives especially in my state trended away from most of my core beliefs, things I thought they believed in. Instead of less government, the conservatives began wanting more government and lots of it for the unenforceable issues.
Rights for women were put down as Republicans seemed to take a negative view on issues I cared deeply about.. and I'm not talking abortion rights, I'm talking Spousal abuse, domestic violence, rape.. they did this long before getting to an aggressive policy to humiliate those who had an abortion or considered contraceptives.
Women were treated in denigrating ways to the point where, when I mentally combined it with the political strategy it became obvious that anyone who wasn't in the old boy's club wasn't entitled to much fun at all.
For a few years, I longed for conservatives to capture reason, to become 'noble opposition', but as time went on, I would sketch out strong arguments from both sides and watch the conservatives in my state and others not grab onto any of them, instead they would obfuscate and frankly just deceive rather then have a long discussion and try to explain how to revise and improve ideas.
Every day in my Email and snail-mail I receive offers from the Republican Party, NRA, and Kansas Republican PACs to consider coming back to work for them, to get in their and craft answers.
In 2008, I sat out the election. I knew the State of Kansas would not vote for Obama, and frankly, I was more content to just, well, shoot from the sideline, anonymously from the internet while keeping my connections open.
That all changes this year. I admit, I have already made a pretty significant financial commitment to Paul Davis (Kansas). I've committed ten years worth of research, data models and message management and I've spent the last 6 months traveling the state of Kansas and Missouri where I have went into town hall meetings to go after Republican candidates from the viewpoint of the Republican argument they are refusing to make. While I don't convert everyone to democrats, I've had more then a few people come to me after those meetings and tell me that they hadn't thought about the issue that way. Why do they have that response rather then simple boo and hiss at ideas that sound as though they are aired by a democrat? Because while they aren't ideas I believe in, they are intellectually honest conservative responses - and the truth has weight. People have no problem recognizing that the (R)s they are electing aren't, in fact, the kind of conservatives they have spent their life voting for without thinking. I have worked to make them answer tough questions in front of small groups, from Iola, Kansas to Joplin, Missouri.
I've put serious money and effort into Paul Davis, and I have asked repeatedly here for others to do the same.
Why am I a Progressive? I am a progressive because I believe that our nation is best served by a real debate of principles.
I'm a progressive because I don't feel as though shaming people over sex is an effective social policy.
I'm a progressive because I realize that the only way you get any returns is to invest, and if you aren't willing to invest then you will always pay for it later.
I'm a progressive because I realized demonizing people, groups, religions and ideas as 'evil' or 'wrong' was not an intellectual answer to any problem... and it was the only thing the (R)s were becoming.
I'm a progressive because once I was confronted with the truth that the things I wanted most for the future, the future of my children and others would not be accomplished with a negative, pessimistic view of the world that views everyone else is wrong and only those like me are right.
I'm a progressive because like Saul on the Road to Damascus, who looked at those around me and listened to the talk and knew I could not be a part of persecuting others as a governmental policy.
I'm a convert. And believe me, there are more like me out there. I don't know how 2014 ends, but I'm ready and willing to talk to as many as possible who have yet to find their road.