That's right, everyone's least favorite thought thief, the man too lazy to scroll down a few links after a Google search has responded to the Plagiarism charges leveled at him by offering to duel to defend his honor.
"Yes, there are times when [speeches] have been sloppy or not correct or we've made an error," Paul said. "But the difference is, I take it as an insult and I will not lie down and say people can call me dishonest, misleading or misrepresenting. I have never intentionally done so."
He continued, "And like I say, if, you know, if dueling were legal in Kentucky, if they keep it up, you know, it would be a duel challenge. But I can't do that, because I can't hold office in Kentucky then."
If only it were still legal he says. As if drawing down with Rachel Maddow would somehow make all this right and prove he wasn't the lazy hack writer/politician he actually is. Honestly what the fuck is up with the
teabagger obsession with guns? Wait don't answer that, I already know. Still the question persists, what exactly would Rand do if he could actually pack heat, go back to back with his antagonist, pace off 10 steps turn and fire?
My guess is he'd first have to steal a gun then he'd probably only walk 5 steps then turn and shoot Rachel in her back. After all, once a lying cheat always a lying cheat.
However, because it actually is against the law to duel in Kentucky (I assume, after all I haven't actually checked) and Rand isn't making that up too, why not sue? I mean this is a huge blow to his reputation. I am sure he'd have no problem winning some kind of monetary damages or at least get a nice public apology and a cease and desist order in his favor. Oh wait, that'd mean all of his speeches, college papers and every single written word would be subject to disclosure. He'd actually be forced to watch as his image as an intellectual was proven in a court of law to be nothing but a sham and that he actually is a two-bit grifter. Far better to rant and rave on the Sunday talk shows after all, misinformation works, right?
Hey Rand, here's one final suggestion. If you don't want to be viewed as a huckster a thief and a ripoff artist, stop acting like one. I know, I know that means you will actually have to scroll down a few more links on Google when announcing your next big policy plan and you'll actually have to go through the tedious work of adding quotes and footnotes and rephrasing/summarizing what was said, but at least you won't have to worry about Rachel Maddow further embarrassing you by accepting to duel you with paintball pistols or something equally hilarious and ending any chance you have of winning the yokel vote by kicking your ass. I'd pay good money to see that, too. Maybe Kos could offer to do it and defend Rachel's honor. That would be epic, hilarious and freaking awesome. Might shut the right up about us wimps on the left too. Well probably not, but one can dream...
Edit: I want to clarify one point. No I don't think Rachel needs anyone to defend her honor, I just happen to know Kos was in the military and knows his way around guns, so I assume he would be able to beat Rand in a duel. I don't know Rachel's background with regard to guns/military.
12:26 PM PT: Thanks for all the recs and thanks to DK editors for linking me on FB. That was unexpected. I agree with the general sentiment in the comments, Rand is a total tool and nice to find out Rachel wouldn't need Kos to get involved. Please, please, please, Rachel, offer to duel with paint pistols with the loser required to apologize.