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Last night, Jon Stewart looked at how John Boehner finally lost his cool with the Tea Party, and how even Paul Ryan and Ronald Reagan are now coming under attack by the insane nutjobs in the Tea Party.

You know what, conservatives have never liked John Boehner.  That's why they punished him by making him Speaker of the House for four years.  But you know who they love?  Paul Ryan.  Sure, he was the co-author of the new budget agreement, but come on.  Tea Party darling, former VP candidate, all wrapped up in the boyish good looks of a summer camp youth minister, a golden child whose fiscal genius will lead us to the promised land where Reagan will rise once more....  (angelic music plays)  And he will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead.  Although really, for the dead, they're already dead, so what's the point?  It's really for the living.  The dead, it doesn't do them....  My point is this.  Conservatives like Paul Ryan.

NICOLLE WALLACE: You just called for more leaders.  Paul Ryan has led.

SEN. TOM COBURN, R-OK: Well, he has led to make a compromise that sells out what actually needs to be done.

NICOLLE WALLACE: But you just called Paul Ryan a sell-out! ...

SEN. TOM COBURN, R-OK: I didn't say that, I didn't say that.

You know that Senator who appears to have just woken up on a park bench is right.  "I didn't say Paul Ryan was a sell-out, I just said he sold out!  Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go bathe in the pond in Central Park."

But Ryan stood fast to his newfound ethic of compromise.


REPORTER: You ever think that a piece of legislation that you were responsible for would be called not conservative enough?

REP. PAUL RYAN, R-WI: Yeah, it's a strange new normal, isn't it?  Groups are going to do what they want to do.

Groups are going to do what they want to do.  That is the nerdiest version of "Haters gonna hate" that I've ever heard.  (audience laughter)  "Well, ah, you know, groups are going to do that.  I believe those with an unfair negative perspective on those events will continue to present to others said negative perspective, regardless of the surrounding circumstances.  Also, fraternal relationships take priority over those with courtesans."  (audience laughter)

So John Boehner's not conservative enough for the Tea Party.  Paul Ryan's apparently not conservative enough for you.  Who is?

JAKE TAPPER (12/10/2013): Perhaps another warning shot for the Republican establishment.  Texas Congressman Steve Stockman, a Tea Party favorite, just threw his hat into the ring for next year's Senate race in a primary challenge against fellow Texan and incumbent, Senator John Cornyn.
That... he's not conservative enough??  This guy.

(2008 John Cornyn campaign ad)

John opened up government,
Let us all take a look.
Gave support to our soldiers
And rooted out crooks.
He rose to the top in just one term
Kept Texas in power, made lesser states squirm.
Big John.

(shocked audience laughter)

That guy?  Guy's gotten high marks from groups like the Chamber of Commerce, the American Conservative Union, the National Journal named him the second most conservative Senator, behind only Alaska's representative, painting of Jesus drilling for oil.

(audience laughter)

Someone is going to commission that.

I'll tell you what.  Give me a taste of this Steve Stockman guy.  I want to know what's considered Tea Party electable these days.


REP. STEVE STOCKMAN, R-TX: It's amazing what they are saying is covered by Obamacare.  If you decide to become transgender, you can also get that covered.  So...

RADIO HOST: Good to know.

REP. STEVE STOCKMAN, R-TX: (in high-pitched voice) ... the next time I call your show.

(disgusted audience reaction)

Ah!!  I get it, it's funny cuz he's an asshole.

At this point, the only guy who could live up to the Tea Party ideals is probably Reagan himself.

REP. STEVE KING, R-IA (5/23/2013): Ronald Reagan's signature on the '86 amnesty act brought about Barack Obama's election.

SARAH PALIN: Let's look at what, you know, political hero Ronald Reagan tried to do with 3 million illegals all those years ago.

BILL O'REILLY: He botched it though, Governor.  Reagan botched it.

Exactly!  That's what I'm saying!

ANN COULTER (9/7/2011): We've got to stop worshipping Ronald Reagan!
Holy shit!!  When Ronald Reagan's just another Hollywood liberal?  You gotta say to your party, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?"  We'll be right back.
Video below the fold.

Then Jessica Williams talked to an asshole from Forbes who wants to eliminate food stamps altogether in true Ron Paul fashion.
Meanwhile, Stephen isn't buying how Edward Snowden is now asking for asylum in Brazil.
He then had a Tip/Wag segment dealing with news from Asia.
He then had a short but hilarious bit about the new Ted Cruz coloring book for kids.
Stephen talked with Doonesbury creator Garry Trudeau about his new TV show, and Jon talked with Blackwater's Erik Prince, which went long.  Here's the unedited interview in three parts.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Originally posted to BruinKid on Wed Dec 18, 2013 at 05:30 AM PST.

Also republished by Electronic America: Progressives Film, music & Arts Group.

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