not for the presents we got, but for the presents we gave. my mom and dad every christmas would explain to my sister and i how there were children that wouldn't get any presents and how we could help santa.
you see, we didn't have a lot of money - it wasn't until i was a freshman in college that i realized how creative my parents were to give us what we needed. mom was a great cook - dad worked long hours - and they had a vision. that vision was of sending their daughters to college when girls didn't GO to college - boys went to college. girls got married, had babies and that was what they did (or they became teachers, nurses or secretaries).
to make that happen (the college thing), my parents learned how to live well on that proverbial shoestring while planning for the future. my mom taught sewing in her father's singer sewing shop before she became a full time mom who sewed for her kids. that's how dad first saw her in the window of that shop. he told his friend that one day, he was going to marry her! they hadn't even met yet.
as she always laughed and said, it took him three years to wear her down!
and, we WERE the best dressed kids in school! she was a genius at that singer!
so, as we grew up, part of our childhood was getting to play santa. we were asked to choose one of our toys to give to that child who was going to be missed. and we were asked to give one that was really nice - not some cast off that we no longer wanted.
come with me over the fold for these memories of mom and dad...
as my dad picked up used bikes and took them apart and made them new again for us, we were gathering something special to give, too. i remember always finding my favorite doll and giving it to mom for a makeover. she then made the doll new outfits and made sure it looked like it was totally new.
and, yes, on christmas morning, there was always a NEW doll from santa - but i would stop and remember my favorite one that had gone on to be the joy in another little girl's eyes.
one year, dad asked if i would be willing to donate the track from my treasured train. of course i did! come christmas morning - i had a box FULL of brand new track - much more than i had given. i still have that train and track to this very day!
from the wisdom mom and dad shared with us, i learned to love watching the person opening that special present, one picked out with great care to bring joy into his or her eyes. my own presents never seemed to shine quite as much as their eyes. and my very favorite part of waiting was to see what response would come after i would say "open THAT one next!"
to this day, gift giving is so much more fun than gift getting. every gift has behind it the search for the perfect fit, JUST the right thing for that particular person! the time spent in finding that gift was always a time spent with that person in my heart!
i miss those days - now, i find a special thing for a special someone and wait to see their eyes when they open "that one next". from the old comics for the 11 yr old boy who never liked to read until he got the first batch for his birthday - now, he never puts books down - to the purple jade that my friend loves... all are the best present i receive during this season - the look in their eyes!
it all goes back to my mom and dad - and their teaching their children that it really IS better to give than to receive.
tonite, i'm sad - my dad's last living sibling, my aunt mary, died this week - someone who gave everyone a smile until the end - so ends the last of mom and dad's brothers and sisters, but they leave their children and children's children to carry on the tradition of love and laughter and giving.
my sadness is the loss of my family on this plane, but i know they are there, saying - THAT one won't have any santa this year - what can you give? make it something special, something really nice, something YOU would love to have.
it isn't too late to give to someone who isn't going to be visited by santa this year - there are toy drives, the little one who lives down the block whose parents aren't working - or the child whose toy on layaway is a single soccer ball. if you don't know any children, there is the senior home where many have seen their families melt away. there is always someone who is waiting for the santa that never comes.
it is the season of giving... of sharing... of loving. please look around and see if there is someone to share - even if it is a batch of homemade cookies!
i've got to go find that special thing that i love to pass onward now...for mom and dad and for you, too, aunt mary!