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And by blows I mean sucks and by it I mean Chris Christie's dick.

If you can stomach several minutes of hot, steamy Republican pr0n read the NPR coverage of Governor Christie's press conference.

For those of you with weak stomachs I'll provide the summary. It starts with the article's headline "Bridge scandal threatens Christie's 'no-nonsense' image". Threatens? Excuse me but it annihilated his image. Christie spent the entire time waffling on his "I'm in charge" image, blamed everyone but himself, and the folks at NPR think this only threatened his image?

But it gets worse. Much worse. The article kicks off with how embarrassed and ashamed the Governor must feel over being betrayed by his staffers. Yes, Governor Christie was just being a gruff no-nonsense Republican governor and if it weren't for those meddling staffers none of this would've happened!

But wait! That's just unzipping the pants. They've got more steamy Republican action in store -- that's right! It's the 2016 presidential election pitch!

Christie, who is widely talked about as a potential contender for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination, said he has "no idea" how the scandal involving his office might affect his decision about whether or not to seek the White House.
Well, gee, maybe you folks at NPR could ask somebody besides the governor what this debacle might do to his election chances. Or are you unwillingly to pull his dick out of your mouth long enough to ask the question? Wait... I think have the answer...
"I am absolutely no where near beginning" the process of considering a presidential run, he said during a marathon news conference in Trenton that began around 11 a.m. ET and lasted until nearly 1 p.m. ET. Befitting his place as a rising star in Republican politics, the news conference was broadcast across the nation by news networks. As Christie spoke, his social-media-savvy staff began posting video clips of his comments on YouTube.
Maybe NPR could just cut to the money shot and formally announce they'll be the official network for Governor Christie's 2016 presidential campaign.

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