"Are you stupid? She lied to me. I'm the real victim here." —Shorter Chris Christie
Hilarious:
In a short statement to CNN on Tuesday, Christie spokesman Colin Reed blasted the theories, including those that posit the closures, which tied up traffic for days in Fort Lee, N.J., were to get revenge on rivals or possibly linked to a local real estate development.
"We're not commenting on every wild-eyed conspiracy theory that's originating on left-wing blogs," Reed told the cable news network.
First of all, this is actually progress for the Christie administration, because until last week, they were more than happy to comment on the "wild-eyed conspiracy theory" that they had ordered the Fort Lee lane closures—and their comment, from Gov. Chris Christie on down, was that they had nothing to do with it.
Of course, that conspiracy theory turned out to be true, and we now know that they had everything to do with it, because the order for the lane closures came from Christie's own deputy chief of staff. What we don't know is why the order was issued and who was ultimately responsible for it.
Until we know the answers to those questions, there will be no shortage of theories on what really went on. The sooner the Christie administration starts helping supply answers, the sooner the speculation will end. And given that they've shown absolutely zero interest in helping get to the bottom of this, here's my conspiracy theory: They don't really want those answers to be revealed.