I had some time free during my lunch break today, so I read the news. I had been vaguely aware for a while that Ted Cruz was using the current flair-up of discriminatory legislation aimed at the LGBT community to attempt to resurrect the Defense of Marriage Act by another name. I read a few articles and the seething annoyance that has been building in my for a while boiled over, so I hammered out a letter to him. I have already submitted to his website, but promised that I would publish as an open letter.
Dear Senator Cruz:
I should state at the outset that I did not vote for you, have no intention of ever voting for you, and will work to see that you are defeated when you stand for re-election in 2018. I also think that your shenanigans since reaching Washington have cast even more than the usual negative light on Texas politics and have successfully managed to turn you into something of a joke in policy circles. However, you are 1/100th of a very powerful legislative body, so I have decided to approach you respectfully to ask a simple question. How does my marriage hurt you and how does it hurt Texas?
I married my long-time partner in a simple ceremony in California in August, 2013. He’s now on my health insurance (because my company believes in treating people fairly), and we’re about to file joint federal taxes. Beyond that not a lot has changed except that we get to say we are married, and that’s remarkably powerful for us. But how does it hurt you? How does it hurt Texas?
I really am curious, and I want specifics. I’m tired of the construction that same-sex marriage is bad for the institution of marriage and has a negative impact on children because children profit from being raised in two parent households with a mother and a father. Aside from the fact that most studies haven’t found that at all, I can point to four fantastic step-kids that will tell you differently. As for the institution of marriage, in my view heterosexual couples haven’t done that great if the fifty percent divorce rate is to be believed. I can also look to my own family. I’m the youngest of nine. Five of my siblings have been married, and only one of those has gotten divorced. The other three are single. None of them reported any negative impact on their marriages on September 1, 2013-the day after my partner and I got married. In fact, a whole lot of nothing at all happened to them. None of the married guests at our reception back here in Texas have gotten divorced either. The institution of marriage seems ok in the small part of the world that my husband and I influence daily. So I have to ask again, how exactly is my marriage hurting you? How is it hurting Texas?
Recognition under Federal law gives us nothing under state law because Texas so wisely banned same-sex marriage by constitutional amendment. Under Federal law, we now have the pleasure of filing joint income taxes which make us subject to the marriage penalty and will cost us about $5000 this year. That would seem to hurt us more than it hurts you or Texas. As I said above though, the power of being able to say we are married is immeasurably more important to us than the economic impact of the marriage penalty.
I’ll close this letter here, but before you push your hate-filled and unjustifiable federal legislation to reinstate some form of the Defense of Marriage Act, I hope you’ll take the time to ask how my marriage hurts you or Texas. If you are honest and look beyond the political optics of appealing to people that just don’t like to THINK about same-sex couples, I would imagine you would find it doesn’t impact you at all. I imagine you would also find it doesn’t impact Texas at all. I really would like to hear the specifics that prove me wrong, but my guess is I’ll hear a vast silence from your office.
Sincerely,
Will Crane
Houston Texas
PS I will be publishing this as an open letter on my personal blog and as a Diary on Dailykos.com.