As I've been poking about in the Kosphere for a few months, I've found somethings that don't change, no matter how long you're on the Net. DK is an online community, not a IRL one, but, like all good sites, it bleeds over into RL. As a veteran of the days of BBS' and once a day email, I don't look to the Net for my "friends" as much as many people do and I think there may be solutions to some of the nascent problems that may crop up when DK/IFL run off with each other.
In the few weeks I've been here, I've seen mention of multiple "saves" and was lucky enough to watch one unfold here the other night. But, despite all of our efforts online, there wasn't a real person to help her within 750 miles. And he'd not have had her real phone number if he'd not gone on a trip last summer and she'd not met up with him then. Otherwise, he'd have been just as impotent to help her as the rest of us were. I have some ideas and questions about converting DK to IRL. And I'd love to see what you have to say on it too, so please follow beneath the orange dingbat:
One of the first thing I stumbled across was the: Connect, Unite, Act group and I think it may be helpful both in real life and online. So here are my suggestions, please comment or suggest amendments. I am eager to hear your views, though if you could tag it somehow with how long you've been on DK, might help the stats people.
These are the ways I connect in Real Life:
Connect: with your actual human neighbors on some level. Bring someone cookies, help them shovel out, compliment their babies/dogs/car, or whatever. If nothing else, and you're home, talk to the mailman while we have them. They save hundreds of lives a year just by noticing the habits of clients on their routes. In order to really connect to the human race, I'm afraid you have to actually go outside, find them and talk to them. I am aware there are people who can't do that easily, but please try.
Unite: IRL find a city council meeting, a picnic, a neighborhood committee person, someone who gels with your politics or passions and stick with them. I've seen lots of crafters and quilters on here. I'll bet they go outside DK to meet with other quilters too.
Act: IRL actions speak louder than words. So these new folks you've met, who are now part of your individual community, and may be your friends one day, be straight with them about who you are and what you want to do. If they want to do it too or it seems cool to them.......go do it! A bunch of women have been feeding the homeless in Madison, WI for over a year now. No grants, no goodies, just humans being humane.
I realize that lots of people these days are scared about data snatching. I'm hoping that DK, with all it's close ties to Silicon Valley types, has that in hand.
These are things I think might work for the online part:
Connect: I'm not advocating a data dump onto DK. But if, after a while, in DK, you find someone you feel copacetic with, trade info for IRL reasons. Make an effort to reach out to people in your groups. Perhaps group admins can come up with specialized spaces or lists. The biggest thing we at DK can do is to make sure that the Kossacks here realize that this is not, sorry Markos, the be all and end all in life. But, we can spread our love of DK and perhaps get more of our IRL friends, family, fellow travelers involved in this aspect of our NIRL.
Unite: Hmm, I'll give DK this, the pie fights and flame wars here seemed, for the most part, to subside admirably when someone was in trouble. The few unsympathetic posters were quietly and, as kindly as possible, told to bugger off. Then, a persistent one was HR so we could go back to caring for the first patient. However, I didn't forget that person, even though I don't know them at all. What that flameout of pain told me was, that the person saw a bunch of folks caring about someone and hadn't felt that kind of caring for their personal situation. So, perhaps a buddy system might help? Or a place to direct people who have real, personal, health, money, legal, etc. problems might go. Even a diary tagged with SOS might do the trick. That way it gets the attention it deserves from someone who can do something about it or at least offer suggestions?
Action: Make an effort to get to a meet. Make meets and Netroots accessible to those who aren't "fully funded" by whomever. The first bit is easy for folks on the left coast and in larger metropolitan areas. But, even some of us IN major metro areas, in my case Greater St. Louis, are the only Kossacks mapped. I have a choice of Chicago or Kansas City which are 6-8 hours away on good roads. Also, I've not been around long enough to go to a meet "in my area" which would usually Not be in my area. I am aware of one coming up in April sometime and will attempt my best to get there. So, my making a connection IRL will be my action.
Now, I'm fairly sure there were people around her she could have called, but she was afraid to do so, for whatever reasons, and turned to DK instead. That says something about DK too. It say that not only is the community here human, we're humane. In spite of geographical, political, lifestyle, or any other thing that can make us "other", a large majority of DK is made up of people who really care about people. You, personally, might not like someone's diaries, politics or whatever, but I have a feeling that when the push comes to shove, your most basic instinct is that we are better than our politics and personal grudges.
Remember: Revolution starts when we take one small step outside our comfort zone, and then another and then another.
What is/was your first step? Please do comment, I'll be around for a while after this diary publishes at 5pm CST. Thanks for listening.