By now many have heard the announcement by CBS that Stephen Colbert will replace David Letterman on The Late Show in 2015. It has also been reported that in his new gig Colbert will drop his faux wingnut persona. On the heels of this news, Comedy Central has now announced who will succeed Colbert for the position of rightwing blowhard. Jump the orange snark to read about the new "Colbert".
The news by CBS apparently has some wingnuts in a tizzy.
Yet believe it or not, Comedy Central has announced that Colbert's replacement will be none other than Bill O'Reilly!
Here is the full press release:
Stephen Colbert has been a pioneering humorist on cable television, and has been compared - rightly so, in our view - to the great American satirist of the rich and powerful, Mark Twain.
Colbert's incisive take on the profound absurdity of today's conservative commentators is without parallel.
Whether it's the racism of a Rush Limbaugh, an Ann Coulter, or a typical tea party activist, the destructive and obscurantist hypocrisy of John Boehner and Mitch Mcconnell, or the sheer idiocy of Sarah Palin and Ted Cruz, Colbert has skewered the leading conservative and Republican figures of our time.
The dimwitted bigots that populate Fox News have provided an especially rich source of material for Stephen Colbert to mock.
The special combination of stupidity, anger, and hatred that Fox embodies and Colbert strived to simultaneously mimic and mock is something not easily replaced.
With this in mind, our network has chosen Bill O'Reilly as the only person capable of reaching that high level of ignorance and malice which Colbert parodied.
Without going into too much detail, we can say that our network will be bringing Mr. O'Reilly on board with a few changes to his Fox News persona. The show will be renamed the "Biff O'Bear Report".
In order to make the character of "Biff" appear buffoonish - but not so moronic, cruel, and repulsive as to be unbearable and unbelievable - O'Reilly has agreed to scale back his attacks on non-whites, his loathing of gays, his sexism, and the general uninformed prejudice that characterizes "The Bill O'Reilly Show".
While Mr. O'Reilly/O'Bear lacks the insight, intelligence and sarcastic wit that was the hallmark of Mr. Colbert's show, we nevertheless are sure that our viewers will laugh at him and everything he says.