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"I took this boot off so I wouldn’t put my foot in my mouth with the boot on," Bundy said. "Let me see if I can say something. Maybe I sinned, and maybe I need to ask forgiveness, and maybe I don't know what I actually said, but when you talk about prejudice, we're talking about not being able to exercise what we think.

“If I say 'Negro' or 'black boy' or 'slave,' if those people cannot take those kind of words and not be [offended], then Martin Luther King hasn't got his job done yet," he added. "We need to get over this prejudice stuff."

You're a charlatan and a hoax, MLK.

"But I was murdered in the 1960s...blah, blah,!"

I don't wanna hear your excuses. You get your uppity self up out of that grave and finish your job!

Those People are so misinformed. Those People actually believe that your civil rights movement battles were about equal rights for all people, especially The Negro who was subjected to the short end of an unjust two-tiered system of rights and privileges in the south known as Jim Crow. Boy, are Those People stupid. Your mission was all about training The Negro to stop whining about racism.

But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. So we have come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

Anybody with an ounce of common sense knows what this really means. The manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination are clearly the fault of trouble-making bleeding heart white liberals who give free money to The Negro. The Negro lives in a tiny lonely ghetto island government house now when he used to live in a tiny lonely island slave cabin in a vast ocean plantation of material wealth where The Negro could bask in the awesomeness of rich white men's money that The Negro himself earned for him. The Negro could admire their work up close and have a sense of accomplishment at outfitting their well dressed masters. Now The Negro languishes in exile, resentful of the rich white men who gave their lives a purpose. Shameful to say the least.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

Equal. That means that everybody gets free stuff. The Negro gets to exist on government subsidies and crazy racist white cattle farmers get to threaten the government with violence if they're asked to pay for grazing on land that doesn't belong to them.

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

Did you hear that? "Table of BROTHERhood". Like when you have a little brother and you call him names at the dinner table and chide him for being inferior to you and less powerful. If he doesn't like it, you give him an atomic wedgie and laugh at his torment and call him a whiny little titty baby.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

Even an idiot can figure this one out. You're saying that The Negro gets way too excited about racism. When people get excited, it gets hot. Every time The Negro starts to make a fuss about something, the temperature in Mississippi goes up about 10 degrees. If The Negro would just calm down and shut up for a minute, the entire southern United States will be transformed into a Caribbean-style open air swim-up bar.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

This one is pretty cut-and-dry. The Negro and his children might be black but at least they don't have to be pricks about it. Keep whining about your rights and your content of character will be judged as a whiny little titty baby and a troublemaker. (See "Table of Brotherhood")

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

Now who could misunderstand that? This one is clearly about cattle grazing. Cows can't walk up hills that well and they're so fat that if they try to walk down into a valley, they end up losing their balance and rolling all the way down. Rough places don't have grass and crooked places make the cows trip over each other's hooves. This is clearly a call for some major infrastructure changes in the landscape so that people's cows don't get hurt trying to eat grass. Hell, if you insist on making cows pay for the grass they eat, at the very least make it easier for them to get to it.

I think you get the picture, MLK. You haven't done your job. The Negro is still whining about crazy, racist, cattle farming, traitorous, land stealing, freeloading white people telling them that they should get off welfare and back to the cotton fields. The Negro and the Union Army continue to misinterpret your famous "I Have A Dream" speech, spreading lies about your mission and what do you do? You just lay there dead with nothing to say. If that isn't the laziest thing I've ever seen.

When you're an African and white people shove you down into the bottom of a ship for months at a time and take you thousands of miles from home to a strange land (if you survive the trip) to work until you drop dead of exhaustion and starvation, it's your job to make people stop calling you a nigger. 100 years after the Union Army fights a harrowing battle, if your daughter is still being raped with impunity, your son is hanging from a poplar tree and you can't sit at the front of a bus, well heck, you're obviously not working hard enough. When the white people are still calling you names and trying to wish you back into shackles 40 years after Jim Crow, it's because nobody likes you because you're always ruining people's racist jokes by being offended. Nobody likes a joke-ruiner. Nobody likes a nitpicker, either. You can't even ignore the dogwhistles of being called "black boy", "slave" and "Negro". Nobody said "nigger". Jeez! It was only implied for fucksake.

I have a dream that one day The Negro will cease to point out racism and let the white man's tongue ring racist bullshit from every mountainside.

Let racism ring from the southern kitchens of untalented celebrity chefs who dream of having a wedding with The Negro as servants in tuxedos.

Let racism ring from the venomous mouths of drug addicted right wing radio hosts on the rich Floridian coast.

Let racism ring from bitter ex Seinfeld cast members who have racist meltdowns that go viral across the internet.

Let racism ring from the hills of Nevada and from the lips of freeloading cattle farmers with a grudge against the federal government for reasons that make no earthly sense.

And when this happens, when we allow racism to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual;

Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, Cliven Bundy's cows get free government grass.


Fri Apr 25, 2014 at 10:00 PM PT: I have to go to work tomorrow but I'll be back after 3pm. Good night and have a great Saturday, DKos!

Originally posted to GenXangster on Fri Apr 25, 2014 at 09:56 PM PDT.

Also republished by Barriers and Bridges, White Privilege Working Group, and Black Kos community.

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