In a diary by theskepticarena, the author speculates as to what will happen to Cliven Bundy. He imagines that Bundy and his minions will gloat over how they stood up for their rights and beat the federal government. But when he dies, before his estate can be probated, all debts will have to be paid first, most notably the fees and penalties owed to the Bureau of Land Management. He then goes on to imagine how Bundy’s children will be irked by the loss to the estate as a result of Bundy’s obstinacy, and will dishonor his memory.
It is a karma fantasy, of course, and people who believe in karma get what they deserve. But as long as we are in the mood to indulge such a fantasy, we might as well go all the way. As I would like to imagine it, his children will not only suffer the financial loss to the estate, which will be much greater than if Bundy had simply paid the fees when they were due, but they will also suffer the degrading experience of having wallowed for years in the glory of an imaginary victory over the federal government, only to suffer the humiliation of an ultimate defeat.
But my lust for karma is not fully satisfied, because according to theskepticarena’s scenario, it would appear that while the sins of the father will be visited upon his children, the father himself will have died happy. Now, Solon said to count no man happy until he was dead, lest the end undo all that had come before, a point that Sophocles underscored in his tragedy Oedipus the King. So if Bundy dies before the government collects, he will apparently have satisfied Solon’s criterion, and may be said to have died a happy man. That is a most disagreeable thought.
Fortunately, there are the musings of Aristotle to console me. Aristotle noted that there seems to be a sense in which even after a man dies, things can happen to his descendants that will disincline us to say that he had a happy life. For example (mine, not Aristotle’s), if the man’s children spit on his grave, and his widow takes the life insurance money and squanders it all on a lover many years younger than she, can we say that the man had a happy life?
In particular, if the federal government eventually collects the money that is due, without firing a shot, thereby sullying the spurious triumph that Bundy thought was his, can we still say he died happy? Or does not the disgrace reach even into his grave and defile what happiness he only thought he had? I like that idea much better, and since a fantasy is whatever we want it to be, I choose this one.
But enough of this. I don’t know whether theskepticarena’s scenario will play out as he imagines, whether the government will wait that long to collect, but it reminds me of a similar story, on a much smaller scale, of course, which I always enjoy telling on the slightest pretext. And as this one actually happened, and is no mere fantasy, it perhaps has more value on that account.
I once knew the owner of a repair business. He had a customer who was unhappy with a repair job that had been done there. After writing the owner a check for $35, the customer picked up the item, went home, called the bank, and stopped payment on the check.
Years went by, during which time one can almost imagine the customer telling family and friends how he had gotten the best of that owner of the repair shop. Then, seventeen years later, he decided to sell his house. That’s when he found out that there was a lien on his house in the amount of $35, and that his house could not be sold until the debt was paid.
Unable to bring himself to go to the shop and simply settle up, he hired a lawyer to take care of it. The lawyer called the owner, who said he just wanted his $35.
“I’ll send you a release,” the lawyer said. “Once you sign it and send it back to me, I’ll send you the money.”
“No,” the owner replied. “You send me the money, and then I’ll sign the release.”
“Don’t you trust me?” the lawyer asked.
“Well, you obviously don’t trust me," the owner replied, "or you’d send me the money.”
The lawyer sent the money, the owner signed the release, and the customer at last was able to sell his house.
I guess that is what they mean when they say that revenge is a dish best served cold.