Washington, D.C - In a stunning move brought on by the Citizens United decision, a corporate entity for the first time will become a citizen official. The legal construct known as AIPAC (American Israel Public Affairs Committee) replaced former-Senator John Kerry as Secretary of State, a move which Israel says should not be second guessed.
While most insiders were surprised to see the first corporate official take such a high level of office, everyone in D.C. agrees AIPAC had the resources and influence to dictate foreign policy for quite some time now, so this transition appeared to be a natural evolution of their current role in the federal government.
"AIPAC has made more a lateral move," stated K Streeter James Hariford, a long-time supporter of AIPAC whether he liked it or not. "Instead of constantly lobbying via suitcases of cash under the guise of campaign contributions, now AIPAC can operate free from the shadows in a very public position. At least for once, the people will know who is really calling the shots, that's for sure."
The Obama Administration refused to comment and referred to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's press office for comment, least they get in hot water again.