If you haven't heard about My Parents Open Carry or thought the book was snark or a bit of satire, alas, I must tell you; it's a real thing available at Amazon and no doubt a book store or Walmart near you.
The author helpfully justifies the need for this book on the back cover:
Here are some excerpts:
Howard Hoffman - The five stars are for the reviews here. These are the finest book reviews on Amazon this summer. Once I started reading them, I couldn't put them down. If you read close to 100 reviews this summer, read these. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll walk away with a big smile. Congratulations to the writers. Good, good solid work. I couldn't give a rip about the book. But these reviews? Take a bow, all. Put them in Kindle form and I'll buy it in a heartbeat.
Geofftoons - After saying our prayers to Jesus and Charlton Heston, I sat on the edge of my kids bed to read them this book, when I shifted my position and accidentally set off my 9mil that was strapped to my hip, shooting myself in the thigh. This wouldn't have been so bad,
(and it goes on hilariously in a macabre way from there)
belqis - I haven't read this book yet, but I'm almost persuaded to order it and leave it on the coffee table just to see my friends' looks of horror when they come over -- definitely a "conversation starter." Thoroughly enjoyed reading the other comments here.
D'Anne Witkowski - It's strange to me that this book is titled "My Parents Open Carry" and yet the cover depicts three adults, one of whom appears to be a low-wage home health aide with a mullet wearing daisy scrubs. Maybe the man and woman on either side of her have taken her hostage? Also, bravo to the authors for their choice of names for the parents: "Bea Strong" (get it? "Be Strong") and "Richard Strong" (a.k.a. "Dick Strong"). Very subtle. The typos in the text and the lack of sentence variation are a nice touch, too, clearly separating the authors from the liberal elite with their book readin' and word learnin'. I only wish this book was available in a collector's edition 14k gold embossed hardcover with all the Jesus parts in red type, like the Bible when it's done right.
Mojoman - I was having a hard time explaining to little Billy why daddy needs to carry his AR-15 into Chipotle when he goes for burritos but now, finally, I have a book that helps. Looking forward to the follow up: My Mommy freebases cocaine and that's ok. Or the next in line: It's ok, he was wearing a hoodie so clearly doesn't live in THIS neighborhood.The first amendment does protect the author and it also protects the reviewers.
Praise Charlton Heston!
So, Go! Read! Add to this!
Best of all, get your chuckle on.
10:50 AM PT: Glad to know this is a self-published book and the likelihood of it showing up in a brick and mortar store is slim or none. Thanks Lenny. Thanks for the rec list. We needed a laugh with all the grim news this week.
Sat Aug 09, 2014 at 8:31 PM PT: I can't believe this diary is still going. Amazon now has 27 pages of reviews on this book. Last I checked Barnes and Noble had none. Some gun owners have noticed the reviews and are in there trying to salvage the savaging. All in all, the reviews have been an enjoyable read.Thank you all for your hilarious comment thread. It's been a great diary for me.