Thank you for helping to explain to my kids there are jerks in this world who think nothing of others. Thank you for helping me to instill the value of cleaning up the neighborhood while we don gloves, and garbage bags cleaning up after you. Even though we wear protective gear, I just hope you don't suffer from some disease like herpes, or hepatitis. Every week, you are out there, leaving your mark on the neighborhood. Every week, I will be out cleaning up after you.
You are welcome to continue to use our front yard as your garbage dump. I see from walking around the neighborhood that you cheat on us occasionally and dump on the next street over. The people of the over street are not as careful to pick up after you, so your handiwork is more noticeable.
I try to imagine who you are:
North Carolina's finest wannabe good-ole-boy, you drive an old rusty pickup truck. You like to drive fast, so I have probably seen you speeding on the way or back to work. I know you like fast food, vodka, and Bud Light. You have a developing beer belly from too much fast food, so you think Bud Light will help. You drink a lot because your are a henpecked husband who married too early, and already have teenage kids who already have criminal drug records. Your job and your boss suck the life out of you everyday. You are in debt up to your eyeballs, and know stopping all the eating out could help control your budget. To add insult, your wife's cooking sucks.
Most interesting is you are distantly related to a North Carolina GOP legislative leader. You agree with favoring business over the lazy poor and blame the welfare state on your personal troubles. You called the GOP leaders heroes for pushing fracking while your uncle is poised to make a fortune off of selling his land rights to the oil and gas companies in nearby Rockingham County. Too bad you shot his cat while drunk that one night 10 years ago.
So go on Sonny, keep living your litterbug life, your comeuppance has already come to fruition. There are some great people in this State. But you are not one of them. Meanwhile, I'm getting my revenge. My family recently bought a house in a very classy looking area of town. Our new neighbors will be a firefighter, a dentist and a teacher. We will live on a cul-de-sac, so the only foreign substance on my yard I expect will be the occasional neighbor doggie doo doo. That might take up another diary some day.