I've been away for a few weeks. I haven't caught up on my reading, yet, so I don't know what everyone is talking about. I have one last discussion related to the gun issue, one which I've been thinking about for a while. I want to post it because my perspective has been altered. In fact, my attitude about several issues has changed in the last two months, and I want to acknowledge what's going on with me. After that, I'm returning to my primary interest, which is politics. Frankly, I'm more optimistic about effecting change in our very corrupt, pernicious, embarrassingly inept government than I am about the possibility of constructive, sensible changes to our lax gun regulations. So I have one more analogy to offer, to demonstrate what I see as inequitable regulation and control of one product deemed to be dangerous and life-threatening while another, proven to be dangerous and life-threatening on way too many occasions, is not only NOT subjected to more control or regulation. It also enjoys increased sales every time it is used to commit 'mass murder'.
It should be obvious that I'm referring to 'assault rifles', or military combat weapons, or whatever other name is appropriate, in the second description. The first 'product' I'm referring to is prescription drugs, particularly pain medication, and specifically Oxycodone. A few months ago, I would've tried to make the case that some people actually do suffer from extreme pain, and pain medication should be available to them. I still support that concept, but the medication should be prescribed by a responsible, ethical doctor, and it should be up to him/her to determine, on a case by case basis, if a patient does require pain meds. And the doctor should be the one who decides which meds, the strength and the quantity. It shouldn't be left up to the patient to decide those things. (And the DEA shouldn't make those decisions either.)
Here's the situation. I spent 11 years in AA/NA meetings in three different towns in three different states, sober and clean. I was living in Prescott (north central Arizona) in the mountains, among the pine trees. I had a paper route delivering "The Arizona Republic", 350 papers over a 60-mile route. I have a damaged disc in my lower back and another one in my neck. By the time I'd finished my route on Sunday morning, I could barely walk, and it hurt just to move. I had a responsible, ethical doctor who actually spent time with his patients. He diagnosed my ADD. (I thought I was depressed.) He prescribed Ritalin, and it changed my life. At the same time, he also prescribed a pain med (Vicodin) and a muscle relaxer (Robaxin). When I made the decision to take those meds, it ended my participation in AA. You can't call your self sober if you're taking any kind of mind- or mood-altering drug, no matter what the reason is, despite it being legally prescribed. I knew I was an alcoholic and drug addict. I knew I always would be. Addiction isn't ever cured. You can be in remission by not using, but the potential is always there. I am probably as good at rationalizing and lying to myself as any addict. (It's one of our main talents, along with hustling up money for drugs and conning people into doing things our way.) I decided it was okay to take pain meds, because I had a legitimate need. And I figured I wouldn't get addicted if I took them as prescribed. Hell, I'd been a professional junkie, needle and all, and I'd hung out with other pros. A pill wasn't a big threat to me.
Then I made one of the many bad decisions I've littered life's pathway with. I moved to the town where I now live. (I'm going to give this place a fictitious name: Sofar.) In Prescott, I was buying a house for the first time in my life. I sold it and moved to Sofar, and I soon came within inches of being a homeless bag lady. I moved here because I have a lot of relatives here, and I wanted to spend time with one of my favorite aunts. My relatives are all Mormons. In fact, everyone I am or have been related to is Mormon. My maternal grandmother, my mother, two brothers and I aren't Mormon. Along with my grandmother's family, we're the only ones. That has been a problem and an issue for years, but I'm not here to talk about my problems with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I grew up on a ranch in Colorado. My only contact with family came on visits to Sofar or when the grandparents came to Colorado. I'd never lived around my extended family. I was here for almost a year before I hooked up with Voc. Rehab. They moved me to Tucson and got me a job at a family-owned heavy equipment rental place. When I moved to Sofar, my state insurance (Medicaid) referred me to a doctor. Luckily (or so I thought at the time), he continued prescribing the meds I'd been taking. He even increased the amounts. By this time, I'd abandoned any pretense of not getting high. That became my reason for taking them, and of course, I did need them for medicinal purposes. When I moved to Tucson, I was assigned another doctor. He continued my regimen, only he switched me to Percoset (slightly stronger than Vicodin) and Soma (way stronger than Robaxin). I had no problem believing I needed those meds with my new job. I maintained the equipment, keeping it clean and waxed and doing small repairs. I loved the job, because I got to learn to operate all those machines, but it involved some physical strain, and by then, I'd developed arthritis in my hands, knees and feet. (It was '98 or '99 when this saga began. I was around 54, but I felt younger.) I moved to Tucson in late '01, and it was way better than living in Sofar. In '08, when the Wall Street Mafia tanked the economy, I got laid off. I was 64, so I retired. Then I made another bad decision: I moved back here. Because I still felt like I was about 40, other than applying for SS, I didn't really know anything about being an older person. I was aware of this apartment house which was reserved for 'Seniors' and is subsidized by HUD for low-income older folks, so I moved here. I didn't know they had these facilities everywhere, and I din't know any of the services available to old folks. I can't even remember to order from the 'Senior' menu at Denny's. (BTW, please don't ever refer to me as a 'Senior Citizen'. I'd rather be old.) So here I am in this boring, backward little town, isolated and cut off from the real world. I can't afford to move, I'm driving an '88 Toyota. (It's 26 years old. I don't know what that is in people years, but it's a lot.) I really can't travel or even leave town, fearing a breakdown. The internet is my only connection to the real world.
When I moved back to Sofar, I found my own doctor. He was fresh out of med school, and he didn't want to write pain pill prescriptions. This was when I discovered the controversy and hysteria over pain meds. The DEA had been here, terrifying doctors and pharmacists about pain meds. Since I am a drug addict, and one that had become addicted to her meds, I found it necessary to locate a doctor to write my scrips. I located one who did nothing else. He'd give me anything I wanted, in any quantity, and that's when the addiction really kicked in. I was in addict heaven. Legally prescribed drugs which cost me a $1 co-pay, provided every month with no hassle, so I upped my strength to 15 mg. and the amount to 120 a month. Plus I still had the Ritalin and the Soma. I was taking 8 or 10 Oxycodone and 4 or 5 Soma a day, along with 4 or 5 Ritalin. I'm lucky to be alive. My doctor got busted by the DEA for over-prescribing, but I found another one. I don't know if PAs (Physicians Assistants) are everywhere, but they are common here, and some of them exist only to write prescriptions. My new doctor, whom I really liked, was actually competent and professional. He had all kinds of test done, X-Rays, etc. He confirmed the damaged discs in my back and neck, and as I got older, they were more of a problem. I was up to 120/20mg ritalin, 120/15mg Oxycodone, and 90 Soma a month. That doctor had his license pulled by the DEA, but the PA in his office just picked up where he'd left off, writing scrips. I changed to an MD, thinking I was going to have a somewhat legitimate doctor, but he's turned out to be a scrip writer, too. From him I learned how Oxycodone and/or Soma kill you: They shut down your brain stem, and you can't breathe. He has a redacted death report of a 34-year old woman who died of an overdose of Soma and Oxycodone posted in his little rooms. After the first doctor lost his license, and young, healthy movie stars stared dying of overdosing on pain pills, I cut back. My latest doctor won't even prescribe Soma. Having finally accepted the addiction and the life-threatening potential of all the drugs I take, I've decided to wean myself off of them. There's a 3-day withdrawal period which isn't all that tough. My problem - and the problem with most addictions - is the mental obsession. That's the one that's tough to deal with. It's like smoking. You have to want to quit if you're going to succeed, and that's where I am: I'm trying to convince myself I want to quit smoking and I want to quit taking these drugs. I'm working on the self-destructive aspect. If I can make that a real concept, I'll be more likely to try to save my own life.
A few months ago, I was in an indignant state of mind over the way drugs are being controlled and restricted, while semi-automatic weapons and high capacity clips are off limits for any control or restriction. Let's just put the 2nd amendment aside, for a minute. My position was that it's ridiculous to control legally prescribed drugs, but we can't even talk about restricting ownership of military combat weapons. They're both dangerous, they've both caused unnecessary deaths when handled by irresponsible or incompetent people. There are a lot of unethical doctors writing prescriptions that are unnecessary, just as there are greedy gun makers interested only in profits who provide all the weapons they can. My pain meds aren't necessary. They don't really even work that well any more. I just keep taking them because I can, and I like them. I do think it's really an inequitable situation when we can control everything that is deemed dangerous except firearms. As a matter of fact, guns are addictive to some people. So let's do what we can to curtail the prescribing and consuming of dangerous drugs. Let's not provide more. And let's inject some common sense into the gun debate, and do what we can to eliminate private ownership of weapons designed for use in war, not encourage more gun ownership. Or let's interpret the 2nd amendment literally, and tell those who insist on owning military weapons that they need to be in a militia. I have no interest in depriving responsible, law-abiding citizens from owning handguns, rifles, or shotguns. I just think the NRA is an out-of-control bully whose behavior borders on sedition. They are interfering with government, and they are helping to put lives in danger. We need to look at the issue of guns realistically, and we need to see if there's an answer to the question of why Americans are so obsessed with guns and why we can't adopt some sane, reasonable regulations. It's a travesty that money is controlling the government and perpetuating the use of dangerous, unnecessary weapons.
I think the first step is to vote the NRA's lap dogs out of office. That's why I'm going back to my involvement in the political process. It's begging for some constructive changes. I want to try to be part of the solution.