I've spent the day trying to get my thoughts on Ferguson onto paper while getting ready for Thanksgiving. We're headed to Mr. Brillig's folks' place, a short 20 mile, or 2hr drive given tomorrow's snow/traffic forecast away. The Muse is still too upset to get anything coherent out about Ferguson but was cooperative when told hey, remember any topic is ok for TC!
With Thanksgiving around the corner, let me tell you about a conversation I had Sunday evening. Follow me below the pile of orange sweet potatoes fold after a word from our sponsor...
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Sunday evenings K1 and I are at church, she for her youth group and me for the class I'm teaching. This means quality time driving back home, in the dark... where the most important conversations between parent and child tend to happen, it seems. We got to talking about what we're thankful for, because they'd done an activity on it during youth group. She said she started out with the usual... a loving family, enough food, etc, but then thought of other things. She's thankful for music, and for art. And then she said something else, something like this: I'm thankful that you and Dad taught me that not everything we do in life is because we get something back. Then she explained...
Ever since she started getting an allowance at the age of 4, we made clear that it was because she is part of the family. No strings, no 'if you don't do x no allowance.' We also made clear that she had chores to take care of, and tasks that needed to be done if we asked for exactly the same reason - she is part of the family. The consequences for not doing chores wasn't loss of allowance. This was not true of nearly all of her friends, whose allowance was linked to beds being made and dishes being put away. It was a lever, not a way of demonstrating responsibility.
K1 said it taught her that you don't do things because there's a reward; you do them because they're the right thing to do - and gave examples:
* Many of her peers do community service hours grudgingly, because you are required to do 12hrs/school year or 48hrs in total to graduate. K1 passed 48 hours by the end of her sophomore year, and will be over 100hrs by graduation. She says she likes doing it because it's helping out, and is fun.
* She tries to help her friends when they need it, not because they'll do the same for her, but because it's nice to help friends. She says that for some of her friends, though, a simple thing like "hey, will you walk with me to my locker?" is answered with "Well, I don't have to go to mine, so I don't want to walk there and back for nothing."
If ever you wonder if your actions matter, remember this diary. In the last dozen years I've wondered if our policy was helping her feel a part of the community that is our family and if that would translate to a sense of responsibility to other communities later in life. The answer is a resounding yes.
What am I thankful for, today? I am thankful for my immediate family, and for the friends I hold close and loved. I am thankful for this community here, both the smaller TC family and the larger dKos one. Yes, even the ones I don't agree with, because at least here the disagreements tend to be literate and well-sourced. I am thankful for my generally good health, and that I have sufficient (oversufficient, even) healthy food and clean water. I am thankful for my education, which taught me to think critically about issues and be able to see beyond my own experience to that of others.
What are you thankful for, on a day when for many of us the answer feels like "nothing"?
I'm thankful for BeninSC, my friend, TC collaborator and one of the best humans I know. Thank you for formatting tonight!
Brillig's ObDisclaimer: The decision to publish each nomination lies with the evening's Diarist and/or Comment Formatter. My evenings at the helm, I try reeeeallllyy hard to publish everything without regard to content. I really do, even when I disagree personally with any given nomination. "TopCommentness" lies in the eyes of the nominator and of you, the reader - I leave the decision to you. I do not publish self-nominations (ie your own comments) and if I ruled the world, we'd all build community, supporting and uplifting instead of tearing our fellow Kossacks down.
From elenacarlena:
Please accept my recommendation of memofromturner's comment. Excellent snark regarding the Ferguson situation.
From a2nite:
I think this is a good comment, by Gooserock, especially in light of the failure of the law to indict Michael Brown's killer. He's made several of these calls to action to elect some better Dems.
From Yours Truly, brillig:
Why did they wait til 8pm to announce? unclebucky and Jeffersonian Democrat have answers, in antifa's "Why do they burn down their own neighborhood?".
Comment Flags for 11/25:
Flagged by JekyllnHyde and IndieGuy, this comment by Technowitch on Ferguson requires no elaboration.
Flagged by oddmike, this comment by agnostic is out of recommendability, but with an interesting analogy.
Flagged by GreyHawk is this comment by FischFry in another Ferguson thread. GreyHawk responded well, and the thread continued below those two! Comment by FischFry, new replyby GreyHawk, ... and so on ... ::wink::
Top Mojo for Monday, November 24th, first comments and tip jars excluded. Thank you
mik for the mojo magic! For those of you interested in How Top Mojo Works, please see his diary
FAQing Top Mojo.
1) The list of evidence read like... by detroitmechworks — 134
2) No justice! No peace! by JoanMar — 129
3) Everyone knows the truth by AoT — 123
4) I'm not by Denise Oliver Velez — 108
5) I have no words at the moment by Free Jazz at High Noon — 97
6) Lies and diversions = justice denied... again by markthshark — 93
7) Yep by 4CasandChlo — 87
8) They Can't Handle the Truth by JekyllnHyde — 86
9) No justice by kishik — 80
10) Heck, Sunday's Arizona Republic gave a half page by Mother Mags — 78
11) This country certainly isn't by Richard Lyon — 77
12) How horrible this is for the country. by JoanMar — 76
13) As a woman, I'm not comfortable framing it as by BoiseBlue — 74
14) The prosecutor became the by JoanMar — 73
15) How horrible this must be for his family. My by Portlaw — 73
16) yup. Heard that bullshit - loud and clear n/t by Denise Oliver Velez — 72
17) Thanks for sharing your thoughts... by JoeAdonis — 68
18) Sadly the truth wouldn't send Wilson to prison by ontheleftcoast — 67
19) I'm sorry by ltsply2 — 66
20) He's trying to shove it off on Holder by Denise Oliver Velez — 66
21) Mocking by John in Cleveland — 65
22) My emails are back to normal by Shockwave — 65
23) I didn't expect any to get through, now or by ThePhlebob — 65
24) I see a big problem for them for 2016 by MargaretPOA — 64
25) Michael Brown by Diogenes2008 — 64
26) This case should have been handled by freshwater dan — 63
27) Justice means... by Joe Bacon — 63
28) Disgusting by moviemeister76 — 61
29) We Did Deserve Far Better by Major Tom — 61
30) Excellent diary. by Phoebe Loosinhouse — 61
31) why are they releasing the decision at night? by SeaTurtle — 61
32) Thank you. I assure you, none of this by dsnodgrass — 61
2014-11-24 Top Comments with Pictures, courtesy of
jotter!