A couple weeks ago I received in email inviting me to Sacramento LGBT Community Center’s Red Dress Party. Upon looking at the details of the email, I was instantly shocked that an LGBT organization would champion such an event---especially during a very pivotal time when our transgender and gender non-conforming sibling’s constitutional rights are being challenged on ballots across our nation. I couldn’t help to think of the basic principle that words and images matter and that as an ED of a small LGBT organization in a rural part of California, how the images that come from a red dress type of event would be too counterproductive to the transgender and gender non-conforming fight for equality within my community. Then on Saturday morning, as I scanned my Facebook feed, I became outraged to find an article covering the event and how Sac LGBT leaders had apologized to their Asian community for a “Red Dragon” themed event, yet they were still silent on the transphobic aspects and I couldn’t help but wonder if a lack of diversity within our LGBT communities leadership wasn’t the real problem.
As an African American/Latino LGBT leader, I have to admit that navigating through the larger LGBT community has been an interesting one. Barring going to events that are “people of color” specific, I’ve often found I stuck out like a sore thumb. I’ve often found the most open to engaging me at said events are the leaders within the transgender community and that example plays out when it comes to cold calling and seeking advice as a newbie. The only leaders that have continually returned our calls for advice has been Sacramento’s Gender Health Care Clinic. Heck, most others don’t event return calls. So when I reached out to a friend in the Sacramento area on Saturday to find out what was going on, I wasn’t surprised that the leaders within the transgender movement in Sacramento had opposed the event and their pleas for change went unheard.
LGBT organizations have an obligation to support our transgender and gender-nonconforming siblings. I’ve heard too many heartbreaking stories from trans individuals who feel they are not welcome or accepted by the L and the G and the B part of our acronym. I’ve taken part in healthy conversations between drag performers and transgender women about how being a female drag entertainer is not mocking femininity or transgender women. And let me tell you, these conversations are emotional and difficult for some. The history of hatred, rejection, pain and nuance far too raw for some to embrace. But the pain is real and for leaders within our community to ignore or reject that reality is concerning.
Our LGBT history is rich with defiance through public displays of toying with people’s perception of sexuality and gender identity. We did it to teach the outside world that we would not be anchored by stereotypes. Yet, when our own actions have the potential to hurt or harm those within our own community, well, we have an obligation to act. To my fellow LGBT leaders, our movement is evolving. It’s maturing. Are we not creative enough to maintain the spirit of an event without asking cisgender men to don a dress?
You know, I’ve been really fascinated by Jane Fonda’s recent discussion on “toxic masculinity”. The actions we take as a community should never be counterproductive to the larger battle towards acceptance and until we stop encouraging behavior that can be perceived as blackface towards our cisgender women, and our transgender and gender nonconforming siblings, we will never be able to address the toxicity that leads to our LGBT youth being bullied and our transgender siblings being murdered at hugely disproportionate numbers.
Respectfully,
Nicholas Hatten