HSA ID Nightmare

Get your Birth Certificate NOW!

Note: No quotes or citings here, just an anecdotal story of a personal friend's experience. He said to feel free to disclose his name, but I see nothing that might add to the topic. I'm willing to do so for good reason, and I do intend to report back to him on the results of this posting; he has (too) little interest in 'politics'. ;(

A friend of mine in his 50's has found himself the victim of a combination of 'odd' circumstances, exacerbated by the callous ruthlessness of this administration and its inability to accept that 'exceptions' are the rule.

See the flip for a list of events which have spelled "Hell" for my friend:

<All Names Changed>

1. "Robert" is born around 1950 in (San Marcos?) Texas to "John Smith" and his wife "Mary Simpson".
   
2. "John Smith" dies when "Robert" is 7 months old.
   
3. In a matter of months, "Mary Simpson" fairly quickly takes up with and moves in with ("remarries"?) "Tom Brown".
   
4. "Tom" is the only father "Robert" ever knows. "Robert" assumes "Brown" as his last name, and Tom raises Robert as his own.
   
5. "Robert" doesn't remain close to them as an adult (mainly due to living across the country).

6. Both Tom and Mary die. They die leaving several unanswered questions, the importance of which doesn't become significant (or, really, even important) until years later. Specifically, they have lived many places in numerous states over the years (including when Robert was young), and Robert not only doesn't know if Tom ever officially adopted him as his son (which would end this nightmare), he doesn't even know if his mother and Tom ever married. He's not been able to conduct a records search to date due to the number of places the records could be.

7. Robert manages to live in the US for approximately 50 years without ever even noticing this 'anomaly', or series thereof, or whatever. Over the years, he graduates from college, buys (and sells) at least one van, one car, and at least 2 houses, marries and divorces (NO kids), lives in several places in the US, opens and closes bank accounts, credit cards, etc. He's a CPA; filing paperwork is his life. He even got a couple of library cards and has at least 2 major surgeries. Got his CPA, passed at least 2 FAA certifications (neither as a pilot, admittedly). IOW, HE thought he was just your ordinary Joe Blow (enough characters already). He had no idea how 'special' he would become.

8. Not quite a year ago, while living in New Mexico and working for an oil company, Robert gets a 'dream offer' of sorts: CFO of a fairly small, established, boring oil company in western PA. Mobil it's not, but CFO it IS. The money's good, for some bizarre reason, he likes western PA, and he's only about an hour from me; all is cool. He accepts. Sells his house in NM, loads up his car, and drives from NM to PA. He had some money saved up (and, I'm quite sure, he left a more expensive area than he moved into), and the first week he was in PA, he opened a bank account and bought a house (with no trouble); how much, if any, was mortgaged, I'm unsure of.

9. In the midst of all the "moving" stuff you have to do (phone, mail, etc, etc), he needed to get a PA D/L and Voter's Registration. Didn't think twice about them; then were just two more items on his lengthy list. They would become - they still ARE - a list of their own.

10. The only "Birth Certificate" Robert has in hand isn't a "Certified Copy"; it's like the cryptic thing my mom always sent me to summer camp with. PA officials won't accept it (likely thanks to the HSA), and guess what - Texas, with most definite thanks to your favorite and mine, the HSA, WILL NOT ALLOW HIM to 'explain' his admittedly odd situation, and get a valid Birth Cert of any sort. His entire "Brown" ID collapses (along with 35 years of CPA-style credit). His NM D/L (and Voter's Reg) are not only not valid, he's likely lucky they don't charge him with fraud simply for having them in his possession! And, of course, he can't get a Voter's Reg w/o a D/L...

HSA is, indirectly, forcing him, at his own expense, to return to Texas and get a legal name change (to Brown, Smith, or whatever, I have no idea)! Before he's a 'real' citizen again.

He is no longer with the oil company; he's been evasive; I suspect all this led to his employment troubles - and it was his dream job...

He's clearly decided he has what he needs now, and is not pushing the issue - but he was talking about coming up here before he even moved. It's been a year. He CAN'T come - he (a) can't ride a plane, inter-city bus, or train, and (b) he can't cross the (Canadian) border. He's a prisoner of sorts, AFAIC.

This is insanity, and I've heard that Birth Cert's are going to become very hard for everyone to get soon, if not already (not that the reasons aren't sound, but the policy execution sucks!). If you don't have a valid one, I'd suggest getting while the getting's good. Makes you wonder if ten years hence there won't be an industry much like the title insurance industry today, whose purpose is simply to verify Birth Certificates...