In an effort to avoid severe criticism among the progressive blogoshere, truthout.org investigative reporter Jason Leopold traveled to Florida today and volunteerily entered an alligator's mouth. This proved too much for even a drought-stressed alligator, who, despite hunger, could not stomach Leopold for more than a few seconds. An AP reporter, who's car coincidentally broke down near the alligator's canal, was present when the alligator said, "I'm really hungry, what with the wildfires and TV crews damaging my habitat, but Leopold's continued defense of his week-old article was absolutely nauseating".
The AP reporter complimented his producer's accumen for sending hundreds of news men and women to Florida to cover the fires, alligator attacks, shark bites, hurricanes and strangely-compelling Katherine Harris poses that are planned to fill the airwaves from now through the end of September.
*UPDATED!: Alligator Indicted! *
.... major story developing.
Sources have revealed that Special Prosecutor Gerald Fitzpatrick has purchased 1 round-trip ticket to Dayton Beach for what insiders have disclosed as "spring break".
**2nd UPDATE! **
"insiders" declared "highly knowledgeable"!
.... more soon.