Bryce Exceptionalism - The True Exceptionalism.(Satire)

My fellow Americans, in the wake of chaos, lies, and war, a new order of freedom and democracy is dawning.  This is the era of Bryce Exceptionalism.  I, Bryce, was anointed by my creator with a unique understanding of morality and the governing of men when soon after my birth I chose freedom and democracy as guiding principles of my life.  This was revealed to me in my divine vision of a Shinning Guy upon a Hill(available in paperback)

You will be as a guy upon a hill. The eyes of all people are upon you, so that if you deal falsely with God in this work you have undertaken and so cause Him to withdraw His present help from you, you shall be made a story and a byword throughout the world.

And in this vision, blessed by God Himself for as long as I stay true to this vision.  And there on my hill I will be a beacon to all who seek a life of freedom and democracy.  I vow to stay true to this holy vision come hell or high-water.

In recent times, we have seen the failures of may forms of exceptionalism.  Many conservatives valiantly strove the cause.  Saint Reagan has passed away, and shall lead us on this earth no more.  Rep. Newt Gingrich was undoubtedly exceptional before his fall from grace.  Rep. Mark Foley had a wise and righteous exceptionalism, but alas his opposition slandered him.  Even the once unquestioningly exceptional Bush Administration has waned under the weight of those traitorous liberals.  I shall not deal falsely with God, nor will I deal falsely with you, because America is ready for the true, unvarnished exceptionalism.

Now is the time for a new exceptionalism: Bryce exceptionalism, a righteous exceptionalism that will restore the pride of all Americans and the grace of God.  But, most importantly, an exceptionalism that means that we can go on doing whatever we please.  With no new taxes!  With lowered regulations!  With reduced government!  With Free trade, cheap shoes, and big screen TVs!  With security so secure that we kill our enemies before they have a chance to become our enemies.  And finally, an exceptionalism that promotes not based on ability but precious loyalty.  This is what I offer you!

I now bear the solemn duty to return America to it’s preordained position of unquestioned sole super power.  It is His will that was revealed to me in my vision.  

I shall enumerate the tenets of Bryce Exceptionalism:

In the name of freedom, I choose the freedoms we can afford.
In the name of democracy, my words is law.
In the name of peace, I shall wage war.
In the name of prosperity, we shall have bankruptcy.
In the name of equality, what is good for me is good for you.

I tell you hear and now: it is the vision that is important.  The vision will save us.  Only by the grace of God, will we reclaim our dominant position in the world.  We need only the strength to execute the vision.  By strength, nothing shall stop us from obtaining the holy vision.  No terrorist nation shall stand in our way.  And there is only one thing that may stop us: strength.  We must have the strength to redefine the constitution; the strength to obtain the natural resources we need; the strength to count only the valid votes; the strength to jail on our political opponents, the strength to fire the bureaucrats who stand in our way, the strength to achieve the glorious vision.

My name is Bryce, and I am exceptional.  I am the new Decider.  In other words, ... what I say goes.  I shall choose what is good for you, and what is good for others.  I shall choose the leaders of this nation for I know what is good for you.  I shall choose the leaders of other nations for I know what is good for them too.  Yes, I know what is good for everyone.  Follow me, and America will be Exceptional again.