The GOP Convention: Peace, Prosperity, Reform, Irony

The GOP has just released the theme of their upcoming convention.

Country First: 2008 Republican National Convention to Highlight Service, Reform, Prosperity and Peace

In other words, they intend to focus like a pack of frickin' laser-beam equipped sharks on everything they don't provide.  

Maybe I'm misreading this.  It could be an example of the kind of literary inversion John Kennedy used in his "Ask not," speech.  Maybe what they meant to say was "For the first time in our country, Republicans will give a damn about service, reform, prosperity, and peace."

Otherwise, there's the problem of a party that's left us with two open-ended wars bragging about "peace." The party that's left us with an unprecedented level of corruption and cronyism talking about "service" and "reform." And the party that's generated the worst economy in thirty years while running up a tab that our great-great grandkids will still be paying talking about "prosperity."

Speakers for Monday night, which will focus on "Service," will include Joe Lieberman demonstrating his ability to serve any forum that will feed his petty ego. Lieberman will be scheduled on the same evening as his war buddy Dick Cheney and official Lil' Abner Mattress Testing Award Winner, George W. Bush.

Tuesdays "Reform" brings Rudy Giuliani to talk about how you can reform law, order, and heroism to mean anything you want.  And 9/11. Lots and lots of 9/11.

Speaking on "Prosperity" will be Cindy McCain, who will explain the traditional Republican means of getting by in hard times: inherit millions from your daddy. Cindy will demonstrate her pity for the middle class workers struggling to get by on three million a year, and for the poor who  must survive with no more than two vacation homes.

And finally, John McCain will be there on Thursday night to focus on (I'm not kidding) "Peace."