Last week folks enjoyed a slightly random diary about siglines so I thought that perhaps another might make a good distraction in a strained week. This one has a theme: siglines that make you laugh. Some are just random humor, others are the iron fist in the velvet glove, and at least one just made me go Whaaa?
There's a poll; pick your favorite. What made last week's diary especially fun was all the others that people contributed in the comments, so please do share ones that made you laugh, even if they're not listed here.
If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
by Amayi
Between my shoulders is a genius. Between my legs is a penis. It seems I have to get both my minds right...
by theone718
(-8.38, -8.00) "If Republicans will quit telling lies about Democrats then we'll quit telling the truth about Republicans." --Adlai Stevenson
by hyperstation
"The difference between the right word and the almost-right word is like the difference between lightning and the lightning bug." -- Mark Twain
by Brooke In Seattle
Civility is the way of telling someone to go fuck themselves in such a way that the someone agrees it probably is a good idea.
by Cali Scribe
This tagline intentionally left blank and humorless...
by left my heart
Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three.
P.S. I am not a crackpot.
-Abe Simpson
by fromer
Bushco, putting the mock in democracy.
by Southern Bell
You have exactly 10 seconds to change that look of disgusting pity into one of enormous respect!
by Cartoon Peril
It's not really cherry picking. Cherries are sweet and delicious. It's more like ...turd mining
by henlesloop
"You know, my wife is so dumb, she is always asking me questions I can't answer."--James Inhofe
by Phil S 33
"It won't surprise you that I don't consider Dick Cheney a particularly reliable source"
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton
by Vita Brevis
The second mouse gets the cheese.
by bgblcklab1
"War can be likened to an erectile penis: an excellent assurance of domestic tranquility, but a dangerous temptation to foreign adventure." -unknown
by Super Grover
It has been said that man is a rational animal. All my life I have been searching for evidence which could support this.---
Bertrand Russell
by triv33
Someone is wrong on the Internet! To the Kosmobile!
by socratic
Happy little moron, Lucky little man.
I wish I was a moron, MY GOD, Perhaps I am!
-Spike Milligan
by polecat
...it is unfortunate that the opposition to the Democrats in this country now consists entirely of crazy people. - NNadir
by RunawayRose
"Newt's all for new ideas. He doesn't HAVE any. He's just FOR them."--Bob Dole.
by Inland
We're sorry. This sig line is temporarilly unavailable. Please try back later. EC-738
by Rick in Oz
The quickest way to get the right answer on the Internet -- post the wrong one.
-- old adage from USENET
by Ab2kgj
+++ Divide By Cucumber Error. Please Reinstall Universe And Reboot +++--Hex[-4.88. -6.97]
by LaFeminista
A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.' Douglas Adams
by dougymi
The only thing you get from sitting on the fence is splinters in your ass. My Granddaddy!
by SallyCat
"I used to have goals. They were evil goals, but they were goals."--Dr. Doofenschmirtz
by ChurchofBruce
The Book of Revelation is not a foreign policy manual.
by Dont Just Stand There