From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
Then and Now
Their new militancy makes other citizens edgy, and it can be shrill. Hurling rocks and bottles and wielding a parking meter that had been wrenched out of the sidewalk, homosexuals rioted [June 28th] in New York's Greenwich Village after police closed one of the city's 50 all-gay bars and clubs on an alleged liquor-law violation. Pressure from militant self-styled "homophiles" has forced political candidates' views about homosexuality into recent election campaigns in New York, San Francisco and Los Angeles. Homosexuals have picketed businesses, the White House and the Pentagon, demanding an end to job discrimination and the right to serve in the Army without a dishonorable discharge if their background is discovered. ...
While homosexuality is a serious and sometimes crippling maladjustment, research has made clear that it is no longer necessary or morally justifiable to treat all inverts as outcasts. The challenge to American society is simultaneously to devise civilized ways of discouraging the condition and to alleviate the anguish of those who cannot be helped, or do not wish to be.
---Time Magazine, 1969
Forty years.
It's hard to believe that two entire generations of gay men, lesbian women, bisexuals and transgendered people (Known collectively by the acronym GLBT)---not to mention their heterosexual friends and family members---have been born and have grown up in the four decades since the patrons of the Stonewall Inn fought back against the police.
Forty years.
It's hard to believe that there are now two generations of GLBTs that have knowledge of active, thriving and, most importantly, out-of-the-closet communities of their own all across America and around the world---even if there isn't necessarily one in their own hometown, but which they can still be connected with via the Internet.
Forty years.
It's hard to believe that now, in many cities across the United States---both large and small---there is a third generation born after Stonewall whose parents are as likely to take them to see a dazzling display of the rainbow colors at a Gay Pride parade in June as to see an ocean of kelly green at a St. Patrick's Day parade in March or the patriotic red, white and blue of an Independence Day parade in July.
Forty years.
It's hard to believe that there was a time not too long ago when almost no one---not even gays and lesbians themselves---gave a moment's thought to the idea of two men or two women standing before a justice of the peace or a member of the clergy and reciting the vows of marriage; those who did considered the idea patently absurd. Not anymore: Gay and lesbian couples by the thousands are now settling down, getting married---and even raising families.
Forty years. Indeed, a lot has changed for gay people in ways that were unimaginable in 1969. ...
As GLBT Americans gain greater and greater acceptance in the broader society, particularly with the younger generation---even in the face of increasingly bitter opposition by religious conservatives---it is becoming more and more evident that, 40 years after Stonewall, there is no longer a closet for GLBTs today to go back into.
---Kossack SkeeterVT, June 2009
"I want thank you for being a critical voice for keeping the nation focused on the unfinished business of true equality for all of our people; and I know, and this administration knows, that we have so much more to do. I promise you, I promise you, with your help we’ll get there in this administration."
---Vice President Joe Biden, June 2009
"This Sunday at the pride parade, try this cheer: We're here! We're queer! They'll get to us eventually!"
---Stephen Colbert, June 2009
Happy Pride.
Your west coast-friendly edition of Cheers and Jeers starts in There's Moreville... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Friday, June 26, 2009
Note: C&J will be off on Monday, June 29 but will return to kiss the month's soggy ass goodbye on Tuesday, June 30. Please feed the cat.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Barack Obama's birthday: 39
Days `til Film Night at Tanglewood with John Williams: 22
Number of records Michael Jackson sold during his career: 750,000,000
Increase in quality of 2009 model vehicles made by the Not-So-Big-Anymore Three: 10%
Rank of, respectively, Lexus, Porsche, Cadillac, Hyundai and Honda in terms of fewest problems reported by car owners: #1,2,3,4,5
(J.D. Power and Associates study)
Percent chance that New York drivers are the angriest in the country, according to a new survey: 100%
(Source: NY Daily News)
Approximate number of bacteria species that live on your skin: 1,000
(Source: The Week)
And from the Department of Homeland Security:
Days the color-coded federal terror alert system has been in place: 2,663
Days spent at terror alert level Blue or Green: 0
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Puppy Pic of the Day: "Argentina, driver, and step on it!"
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CHEERS to Dan Froomkin. Today is his last day as online columnist for the wretched Washington Post. His swan song includes a perfect deconstruction of the previous administration and its enablers in the lapdog press:
When I look back on the Bush years, I think of the lies. There were so many. Lies about the war and lies to cover up the lies about the war. Lies about torture and surveillance. Lies about Valerie Plame. Vice President Dick Cheney's lies, criminally prosecutable but for his chief of staff Scooter Libby's lies. I also think about the extraordinary and fundamentally cancerous expansion of executive power that led to violations of our laws and our principles.
And while this wasn't as readily apparent until President Obama took office, it's now very clear that the Bush years were all about kicking the can down the road---either ignoring problems or, even worse, creating them and not solving them. ...
How did the media cover it all? Not well. Reading pretty much everything that was written about Bush on a daily basis, as I did, one could certainly see the major themes emerging. But by and large, mainstream-media journalism missed the real Bush story for way too long. ... Hopefully, the next time the nation faces a grave national security crisis, we will listen to the people who were right, not the people who were wrong, and heed those who reported the truth, not those who served as stenographers to liars.
I'm sewing the wings on the pig as fast as I can. See ya 'round, Dan. Soon, we hope.
JEERS to the Rule of Threes. When the week started, it was "gravely-ill" 92 year-old Walter Cronkite who appeared to be headed for the Great Beyond (we hope he's doing better and that he'll be with us for awhile longer). But when the week ended, we'd instead lost Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson...each a unique icon of pop culture. McMahon the jolly and quick-witted sidekick. Fawcett the actress and pin-up queen who later invited people in as observers of her ongoing battle with cancer (and the medical system). Jackson the visitor from another planet who dazzled us with his superhuman talent but ultimately couldn’t function in our atmosphere. All three were instantly recognizable around the globe. And each one gave us a reason to look the rest of the world in the eye and say: "America...fuck yeah!"
P.S. For those of you keeping score, the tabloids have already attributed Jackson's death to aliens who escaped from Area 51, murder by the CIA/Oprah syndicate, a mixture of Pop Rocks and Coke, the ghost of Elvis, and the Bat Boy. But not a heart attack because, hey, let's not get crazy.
JEERS to the terrible touch of technology. I'm finding that guilt is a horrible master. Yesterday morning I wrote this for today's "By the Numbers" section:
Days 'til Michael Jackson's AWESOME farewell concerts begin: 17
I decided not to run it so I highlighted it and hit the DELETE key. Not ten minutes went by before CNN.com was reporting that he'd stopped breathing. Sadly, hitting UNDO didn’t work. And just to be safe I've removed that particular key, along with the ones marked END and BREAK.
CHEERS to gastronomical greetings. On June 26, 1963, JFK delivered a speech in then-West Berlin where he said, famously, "Ich bin ein Berliner!" Over the years many people have erroneously said that he was calling himself a jelly doughnut, but that is not true---he was referring to himself as a citizen of the city. Unfortunately, things turned awkward when, after his speech, he was overheard saying, "Ich bin so hungry I could eat a frankfurter and a couple of hamburgers."
JEERS to things we shouldn't be reading in the paper eight years after the attacks of 9/11. Not that it's surprising, I guess, but did you know that Decider Bush and Darth Cheney were so eager to fellate the NRA that they wouldn’t even take steps to keep guns out of the hands of terrorists? Wow:
Citing a "terror gap," Sen. Frank Lautenberg (D-N.J.) and Reps. John Conyers Jr. (D-Mich.) and Robert C. Scott (D-Va.) released the study, and Lautenberg introduced legislation yesterday to give the U.S. attorney general authority to stop the sale of guns or explosives to terrorists.
"The special interest gun lobby has so twisted our nation's laws that the rights of terrorists are placed above the safety of everyday Americans," Lautenberg said in a written statement. "The current law simply defies common sense."
But in fairness, they did keep America safe from exploding monkey diapers. Make sure you remember that, biographers!
JEERS to the crotch-control cops. Is nothing sacred anymore? This is why I have no immediate plans to become a city employee in Brooksville, Florida:
What city employees don't wear is making as much news as what they do wear. ... The new dress code calls for employees to use some protection [of] the deodorant kind. Underwear is also a must for both women and men. "I don't understand how are they going to be able to tell if they're wearing underwear or not," adds Branch.
One employee is planning to file a lawsuit for unfair discrimination. If you want to read it, just Google City of Brooksville v. Lenny "Long Dong" McStinkypits.
CHEERS to home vegetation. The glow screen will no doubt be awash in Michael Jackson tributes this week, but there are a few alternatives besides actually shutting the thing off. New DVD releases include the Oscar-nominated Waltz with Bashir and the Crap-nominated Pink Panther 2. At Wimbledon, "court" will be in session---HaHaHaHaHa!!! (That never gets old.) U.N. Secretary Susan Rice talks about Iran and North Korea on Face the Nation. David Gregory, following his usual audience-shrinking routine, books one Democrat (David Axelrod) and two Republicans (Lindsay "Bomb Iran" Graham and Mitt "Bomb Iran" Romney). On This Week, George Stephapalooza will talk with Joe Scarborough...unless David Gregory throws a hissy fit and threatens to hold his breath until he turns blue. One moment please... I've just been informed that Joe Scarborough won’t be on This Week because David Gregory threw a hissy fit. Cool...that means it might be slightly watchable, then. Happy viewing!
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Five years ago in C&J: June 26, 2004
CHEERS to French waterworks. Thanks to private U.S. donations, the newly-refurbished Bosquet des Trois fountains (designed by Louis XIV) at Versailles are working for the first time in over 200 years. But c'mon...was Perrier really necessary?
JEERS to poor planning. U.S. News & World Report says that one-third of all baby boomers have nothing saved for retirement. Silver lining: It'll be easier for the other two-thirds to get a decent tee time.
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CHEERS to Bill Maher. He's taking the night off from HBO's Real Time, so in his absence I'm highlighting one of his "New Rules" from last week. It's almost like he's been reading Daily Kos or something:
[E]very time Obama tries to take on a progressive cause, there's a major political party standing in his way: the Democrats. ... This year, we're hearing that a public option for health care is unlikely because it doesn't have the support of enough Democrats. Even Ted Kennedy's plan leaves 37 million uninsured. This is because we don't have a left and a right part in this country anymore. We have a center-right party and a crazy party. [O]ver the last 30-odd years, Democrats have moved to the right, and the right has moved into a mental hospital. ...
Shouldn't there be one party that unambiguously supports cutting the military budget, a party that is straight up in favor of gun control, gay marriage, higher taxes on the rich, universal health care, legalizing pot, and steep, direct taxing of polluters? These aren't radical ideas. A majority of Americans are either already for them...or would be if they were properly argued and defended.
[W]hat we need is an actual progressive party to represent the millions of Americans who aren't being served by the Democrats. Because, bottom line, Democrats are the new Republicans.
And what are the Democrats---the so-called "moderates"---in Congress so afraid of when they've got big majorities, the White House bully pulpit, and public opinion on their side? Mostly I think they're afraid that their corporate supporters will turn off the money spigots and turn on their opposition spigots at re-election time. And so, going against what they know is the right thing to do, they cave and seek the mushy middle, which doesn’t exist except in their minds, and nothing much gets done. With July 4th a week away, today is as good a day as any to thank our lucky stars that these feckless ding-dongs in Congress weren't the ones in charge of declaring independence. If they were, today we might still be bitching about the feckless ding-dongs in Parliament with their open-door policy for gays in the military and universal health care and... Oh, never mind. Pour me a Guinness.
Have a great weekend. Think happy thoughts. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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