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Reposted from And Now for Something Completely Different by HoundDog

I just received this missive from Torquemadawg, saying that Indiana is considering decriminalizing small amounts of marijuana. This seems sensible to me. I pass it on here without comment.

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Brothers sisters and others
I speak to you from the Heartland
Come forth out of the darkness
and step into the light
of marijuana legalization

Here's the latest news
from Indianans
considering decriminalization.

Indiana has some of the harshest criminal penalties
for mere possession.

The current law in Indiana says that possession of even half a gram of weed is a criminal offense that can result in a $5,000 fine and up to a year behind bars. But a new bill introduced last week by state Sen. Karen Tallian (D-Portage) would make possessing less than two ounces of cannabis a civil offense, similar to a parking violation.

Supporters of decriminalization say the bill would save taxpayer dollars and free up law enforcement resources to focus on other types of crimes, such as robberies, rapes and murders.

Although a majority of Indiana residents support decriminalization, the bill may still have a tough time becoming law. The Indiana legislature failed to pass similar measures last year and the year before. The state's Republican governor, Mike Pence, spoke out in March 2013 against lowering penalties for possession. Pence has also said he considers marijuana to be a "gateway drug."

 photo darthvader1asmall_opt_zpsebba6fc1.jpgTorquemadog

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This is Hounddog here again.  I worry about that boy sometimes.

I do approve of Indiana moving in the right direction. $5,000 and a year behind bars for possession of half a gram does seem a tad excessive when you stop and think about it.
How soon will we see a case of a marijuana tourists accidentally leaving a half of gram of legally purchased weed in Colorado in the bottom of their suitcase, and then get arrested and put in jail for one year in Indiana when the police find stray crumbs?

OccupyStephanie reminds us that the for profit prison companies are going to fight this tooth and nail.  

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Explanations abound for the mass extinctions of slow-witted lumbering beasts that once roamed the earth only to find their skeletons incorrectly reassembled in the natural history museums of the world. Today, however, we are witnessing a mass extinction in real time, a mass suicide of paleo-epic proportions; an extinction apparently yearned for by its victims. Nothing in your science text books explains this bizarre phenomenon, so grab some popcorn and take a seat as your intrepid diarist delves into this antediluvian debacle.

The architect of this extinction is Calgarasaurus tedcruzii. Hailing from the Canadian Shield, this anointed king of the always gullible Baggasaurs spotted the approaching asteroid, and figured out a way to ensure a direct hit on fellow GOPasaurs.  Normally, Calgarasaurs tend to their own business in the greasy Albertan oil sands. This specimen, however, has utterly flummoxed the Birthersaurs by declaring itself "American" by virtue of birth to an American female in much the same way that Obamasaurus Rex would have... Oh, coprolite! No! It can't be!!! But... I digress.

C. tedcruzii applied his highly educated mind to the problem of extinction and recast it as an "opportunity" to wreak massive destruction on Obamasaurus Rex, mainstream GOPasaurs, and ordinary people simply trying to survive. In the end, O. Rex reigned supreme, yet C. tedcruzii looked upon the steaming scorched earth and pronounced it "a good start".

His jubilation was not shared by Boehnersaurus lachrymosii whose extinction loomed large as C. tedcruzii blathered on. The Orange One did his best to walk the survival tightrope, a task made all the more challenging by his continued reliance on ethanol-based sustenance. In the end, he "survived", but with his planetary dominance greatly diminished as the Baggasaurs threatened further assaults on their own kind unless they are given... wait. They'll remember it in a second... it's on the tip of their tongue. Hold on...

Sensing a seismic shift (or perhaps just short of cash), Griftasaurus palinii emerged from seclusion to work her Mesozoic magic on witless followers whose short memories left them vulnerable to one more scam. Attaching herself to C. tedcruzii like a life-draining parasite, G. palinii yammered away at that shrill frequency that caused proto-birds to fall from the sky while besotted Baggasaurs opened their hearts and wallets to their once and future queen.

The Henry Higgins who foisted this redneck Eliza Doolittle on the world, McCainasaurus getoffamylawnii, attempted to distance himself from the ongoing bloodbath by reprising his elder-statesman-voice-of-reason persona. By now, however, even the most micro-minded of his fellow GOPasaurs had consigned him to the scrap-heap of history, his illustrious military and political career eclipsed by the possibility of G. palinii sitting one heartbeat away from the nuclear launch codes.

Speaking of shrill voices, Archeopteryx bachmannii joined in the fray, squawking something about Obamasaurus Rex and "end times". As usual, this was no more than paleo-projection as her own self-inflicted end times had spelled the extinction of her reign of error. Still, as so often happens, the song has ended, but the malady lingers on as A. bachmanni cannot accept her fate and continues her pathetic efforts to warn the world of one impending doom, while blissfully unaware of the real impending doom.

Impending doom has long followed Darthvadersaurus cheneyii, who has eluded the Grim Reaper with the help of the same cutting-edge medical care that he would happily deny other lifeforms. Despite several brushes with extinction, this cold-blooded, soulless creature not only walks the Earth, he shamelessly shills his latest book, explaining how - despite his infirmities - he managed to serve as puppeteer to the guileless Shrubasaurus "W".  Some secrets are best taken to the grave. Just sayin...

The hydration-challenged Cubanasaurus Rubio while temporarily forgotten in ongoing festival of self-destruction remains alive. His vision of a world where Immigrasaurs could freely roam the Continent, however, has been relegated to oblivion. In order to maintain his end of the Faustian bargain, C. Rubio has agreed to scale back his vision to the point that it's recognizable only with the aid of a scanning electron microscope. Otherwise, someone will be swapping out that water with hemlock.

As the Baggasaurs continue sinking their teeth into their GOPasaur kin, a few denizens of the swamp have been plotting world domination. While many believe that C. tedcruzii will claim his self-anointed place in the paleo-pantheon as the next White Cave occupant, he will have to eliminate some heavyweight - or formerly heavyweight - contenders. Behemasaurus christii has reduced his girth (again, with the aid of the medical options he would deny to other lifeforms) and focused his eye on a possible slog to the White Cave. He will have to eliminate Plagiasaurus randpaulii, son of the post-octogenarian Texasaurus ronpaulii and devotee of the Rand Petroglyphs.

Even Wisconsinasaur paulryanii, the would-be sixth son of Dressageasaurus cruella and her mate Brontosaurus romneii, has been recasting his death-dealing philosophies in cold numerical terms aimed at appealing to Conservasaurs. Sadly, extinction has claimed most of them, leaving only the shrieking Baggasaurs to run the place. These craven Cretaceous cretins watch that curious glowing object in the sky and yell, "BRING IT!!!" and drool in anticipation of the resultant shock and awe that they will unleash upon a world that failed to show them the proper respect.

Respect has been dwindling for the paleo-pundits who rode this train-wreck to its illogical conclusion, fanning the flames of hate and stoking the fears of creatures incapable of critical thinking. Venomasaurus limbaughii, abandoned by many of his enablers sponsorsaurs, continued his assault on females, alternatively-hued or alternatively oriented lifeforms, Immigrasaurs... in short, the wily mammals who would be taking over the place soon. Anorexiasaurus coulterii pronounced her love for one, then another, then another of the would-be White Cave occupants as she slid into irrelevance like a thread of spaghetti slipping down a drain. Buygoldasaurus glennbeckii became just another deinstitutionalized voice crying in the wilderness.  

The seismic shift we're witnessing? It's just the crazed Baggasaurs and desperate-to-survive GOPasaurs lurching to the far, far Right, desperate to extend their grip on a slippery world. Once enough of them pile on, they'll be experiencing that wild ride they crave... a ride right down into the Subduction Zone. Eventually, they'll be reduced to their only value: a couple of BTUs. Until then, enjoy the show... and invest in popcorn futures!

Discuss
Reposted from And Now for Something Completely Different by HoundDog

 photo Romneybendingover.jpg
This just in from our "this is too good to be true" department - Mitt Romney may be on the comeback trail as Steve Peoples reports the announcement of an August 6 Mitt Romney New Hampshire Fundraiser

BOSTON — Republican officials have confirmed that Mitt Romney is scheduled to attend an August fundraiser for the New Hampshire GOP, the first time the 2012 Republican presidential nominee will headline a political fundraiser since his November loss. ...


After his humiliating election loss, Romney has stayed in seclusion, but recently "has hinted at a desire to play a more active role ahead of the 2014 midterm elections." I sure hope he doesn't find a way to make an ass of himself.  Or, "show his ass," - what is the right expression?
He told the Wall Street Journal in May that he plans to re-emerge in ways that would "help shape national priorities."

His brand suffered after losing what was widely considered a winnable election, but Romney maintains a national fundraising network that could help generate millions of dollars for candidates, super PACs and party committees. He attended a three-day summit last month in Utah that featured prominent Republican fundraisers, a handful of potential 2016 GOP presidential candidates and even some high-profile Democratic strategists.

Oh, what a delightful development - Mitt Romney reemerging to help "rebrand" the image of the Republican Party. As if were not enough that Republicans have already elevated anti-immigration efforts, and attacked women's right to choose in Texas as major themes of their "New Republican Party" rebranding efforts. Is it too early to hope for Rick Perry, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, and Rick Santorum to run again in 2016 on a "Let's return America to the 47%" platform?  
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Reposted from HoundDog by HoundDog

 photo rickscott_zps60297648.jpg

From our "see, this is why we can't have good things" department, citizens of Florida learn what happens when you elect morons to control state legislatures -they pass idiotic legislation.

The Miami Herald and Huffington Post report:

When Florida lawmakers recently voted to ban all Internet cafes, they worded the bill so poorly that they effectively outlawed every computer in the state, according to a recent lawsuit.

In April Florida Governor Rick Scott approved a ban on slot machines and Internet cafes after a charity tied to Lt. Governor Jennifer Carroll was shut down on suspicion of being an Internet gambling front -- forcing Carroll, who had consulted with the charity, to resign.

Florida's 1,000 Internet cafes were shut down immediately, including Miami-Dade's Incredible Investments, LLC, a café that provides online services to migrant workers, according to the Tampa Bay Times.

 photo Wile-E-Coyote-BEEP-BEEP-wilee-quixote-7263942-800-600.jpg

And, how not surprising is it to discover this effort is being led by our top Florida clown-fool, Rick Scott, who "reportedly called the ban, 'the right thing to do for our state."'

Poll

Do you think the HoundDog should start writing again even before the next election cycle?

34%368 votes
46%495 votes
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10%110 votes
2%22 votes
5%61 votes

| 1068 votes | Vote | Results

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                        grossly oversimplified
                                Actually, the GOP version is only about 6,000 years

It's not easy being green a GOPasaur. All signs points to their individual and collective extinction, yet they still walk the Earth, seemingly oblivious to their fate, unable to see what any sentient creature could see: it's so over. The planet, it seems, is moving on without them and they're left to ponder the cruel vicissitudes of fate. For surely, it must just be fate, right?? It couldn't have been anything that they said or did, could it??

Like young children, taking to heart their teachers' threats that their latest malfeasance would be etched in stone on their Permanent Record, GOPasaurs live in perpetual dread that their crimes, misdeeds, ethical lapses, and offhand remarks about female reproduction. Unfortunately (for them), while their witless song may have ended, the malady lingers on, thanks to the preservative properties of the fossil record.

Thus is is with unalloyed joy that some of our paleo-pals have discovered a solution to their extinction fears, a way to wipe the slate clean of their missteps and recast themselves in ways that the votersaurs will find appealing, even irresistable. Follow along below the Gobi Desert Easter Egg for the Rest of the Story...

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GOPasaurs and GOPasaur wannabees, journalists, lobbyists, and hookers were joined by paleontologists at the Cretaceous Political Animal Circus (CPAC), proving once again that politics makes very, very strange bedfellows. Rarely do we get to observe so many extinction-ready creatures in one place, a diorama come to life, with gritty GOPasaur-on-GOPasaur carnage worthy of paleo-pay-per-view.

While some GOPasaur heavyweights such as Behemasaurus christii and Getoffamylawnasaurus mccainii and Transvaginasaurus mcdonnellii were notably absent, the Grim Reaper's short list of extinction candidates was as lengthy as it's ever been. Having all of his prospects together in one room? Priceless!

Griftasaurus karlroveii, not one to miss an opportunity to siphon funds away from the gullible GOPasaur hangers-on, has yet to realize that his position atop the Cretaceous food chain ended some time ago. The former king-maker listened in horror as Griftasaurus palinii, sporting black leathery coloration, ripped him an alternative orifice. The vacuous G. palinii, snarkily slurping on a Big Gulp soda to fill the void in her cerebral cortex, yammered on in her "I-realize-that-you-people-aren't-too-bright-so-I'll-speak-real-slow" voice. Her besotted followers, reflexively reaching for their wallets, loved every minute of her schtick.

Meanwhile, tectonic rifts emerged in the GOPasaur party to the dismay of the Kochasaurs, who, despite their millions of dollars in political "investments" had to face facts: they wuz robbed! Instead of filling the CPAC venue with GOPasaur superstars, statespersons, and visionaries, they wound up with washed-up has-beens whose continued presence on the planet defies logic.

Case in point: Brontosaurus romneii. Sure, he was the party's failed presidential candidate and therefore worthy of consideration. But goshdarnitall, hadn't his mate, the Freon-veined Dressageasaurus cruella, promised that this was "their" last campaign? What part of "go away!" do these people not understand?

Then we have Stegasaurus newtii, holding up an incandescent light bulb to signify that the GOPasaurs needed some new ideas. LEDs maybe? Compact fluorescents? Admittedly, S. newtii has been known to frequent any venue that covers his speaker fees, but it's been eons since he's had anything to say.

Among the other GOPasaur glitterati who've outlived their usefulness is Birthasaurus thedonaldii, whose continuing obsession with the origins of Obamasaurus Rex has grown so old that even Orlysaurus taitzii is saying, "give it a rest, you pompous bastard."

Cubanasaurus marcorubio, the Latinosaurus GOPasaur messiah-du-jour insisted that there was nothing wrong with the party, because, America! The GOPasaurs loved hearing that, as nothing is more soothing to their frazzled nerves than the affirmation that the status quo is fine the way it is. However, Libertariasaurus notnamedforAynrandii, countered with a withering indictment of the party as mired in the Triassic tar pits, unable to find its ass with both hands.

Speaking of tar pits, Texasaur tedcruzii, whose Canadian Shield origins seem of no concern to these birth-certificate-obsessed GOPasaurs, used the CPAC forum to continue advancing his Right-wing agenda. Even his fellow attendees found themselves wondering if he hadn't in fact crossed a land-bridge too far.

Ammunitiasaurus lapierrii, always a crowd favorite at any GOPasaur gathering, continued his own random walk into the maelstrom of insanity with continued pleas to arm every sentient being in the drainage basin. As if to prove his point that danger lurks everywhere, several dark-colored GOPasaurs were escorted from the CPAC hall for Participating in Politics While Black.

Proving once again that hateful venom is not confined to the male GOPasaurs, Anorexasaurus coulterii took the stage to vilify everyone from B. christii to O. Rex, to the raucous laughter and applause of those in the audience who were spared her toxic barbs. Female GOPasaurs do provide plenty of entertainment at CPAC, as long as they're not aspiring to any political position other than "party animal".

The real winners in this paleo-parade of extinction-worthy life-forms were the organizers, caterers, hotel staff, cab drivers, souvenir vendors, and of course hookers who separated these witless GOPasaurs from millions and millions of dollars that they'd otherwise waste on their spouses, kids, pets, and local charities.

Bottom line: no signs of evolution at CPAC this year. They're perfect fossil record is still intact.

Poll

The main factor driving GOP extinction will be:

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3%1 votes
30%10 votes
30%10 votes
6%2 votes
3%1 votes
3%1 votes
9%3 votes

| 33 votes | Vote | Results

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Reposted from cassandracarolina's fossil record by cassandracarolina

          Brontosaurus print

Seismometers across the continental plate reverberated as previously-thought-to-be-extinct Onepercentasaur Brontosaurus romneii emerged from one of his well-appointed caves to grace the world with his witless utterances. With the onset of the paleosequester, this unwelcome political behemoth felt it necessary to return to the miasmic swamps of political life to point out that, had he eluded electoral extinction, Things Would Be So Much Better. This insipid viewpoint was amplified by B. romneii's mate, Dressageasaurus cruella, whose vocalization - like nails on a Cretaceous chalkboard - continue to jangle the nerves of all organisms in the drainage basin.

"If only", they sigh, in carefully rehearsed unison, "we had been the chosen ones. All of this awfulness could have been avoided." Indeed. Awfulness of an altogether different sort would have pervaded the land, or at least 47 percent of the land. Latinosaurs would be stampeding in throes of self-deportation. Venturecapitasaurs would be driving workers into the streets while expanding their vast offshore caverns to accomodate still more wealth. The cries of the unemployed, the impoverished, the elderly, and the ill would reverberate across the land. All the while, B. romneii's dynastic wealth would grow to proportions that would cause serious global tectonic disruption.

When last we heard from these two, they were licking their wounds after the painful realization that all their grand evening of fireworks and victory toasts had come crashing down around them. Indeed, the only joy of that dark night came from the immediate termination of employment of B. romneii's campaign staff, and the concurrent cancellation of their credit cards, stranding them far from home. Yes, good times, but alas, over all too soon.

As fellow GOPasaurs engaged in the gnashing of teeth, self-loathing, and blamestorming that has become their hallmark, B. romneii and D. cruella slunk away in the night, never to be heard from again, until now, when their vocalizations have resumed, fueled by a heady mixture of righteous indignation and denial. Follow along below the coprolite for The Rest of the Story...

Poll

What's next for B. romneii?

46%93 votes
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| 202 votes | Vote | Results

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As reported in the New York Times and other reputable sources - and widely mocked elsewhere - Griftasaurus Karlroveii has concocted yet another plan to stave off extinction... or at least make some money off it if it's really unavoidavle. In a party where dinosaur-on-dinosaur violence has reached levels worthy of paleo-pay-per-view coverage, the bespectacled behemoth believes that he has found the Secret of Eternal Relevance. As always, it involves money. Other people's money, obviously.

His latest Life Extension scheme involves establishment of the Conservative Victory Party. While that sounds dreadfully bland, rest assured, blood will spill, and carnage will result. Don't touch that dial! First on the CVP's hit list? The witless Baggasaurs whose moronic Mesozoic meddling has already cost the GOPasaurs some key seats in the House and Senate. Like a clown car filled with velociraptors on crack, the Baggasaurs provided ample amusement for those of us on the other side of the aisle, but have been an unending torment for their supposed allies.

Spawned by the evil genius and deep pockets of the Kochasaurs and a few other one-percenters with more free time and money than brains, the Baggasaurs were foisted on the American public as a true grass-roots Paleo-phenomenon. Easily identified by their curious headgear, poorly-spelled signs, and angry vocalizations, the Baggasaurs played their parts to perfection. Their walnut-sized brains ensured that they would never discern that they were simply "extras" in the Greatest Story Never Told, and that despite their daily trips to the mailbox, their checks would never arrive.

Still, when measured in terms of damage done versus IQ points, the Baggasaurs will leave a dent in the fossil record. In retrospect, their Reign of Error may represent the Beginning of the End for GOPasaurs. Some analysts surmise that G. karlroveii is very much in agreement with this view, but clearly not above using it to advance his own objectives. Follow along below the coprolite horizon for more...

Poll

How will Griftasaurus karlroveii finally go extinct?

24%12 votes
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| 50 votes | Vote | Results

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Reposted from cassandracarolina's fossil record by cassandracarolina

A new day dawns, and the Earth shifts beneath their feet of the already uneasy GOPasaurs. The Grim Reaper has been working overtime to keep up with the carnage, and it's not over yet, not by a long shot. Here's the latest on those who've been culled from the herd, and those whose paleo prospects are looking especially grim.

Make that a double. Boehnersaurus lachrymosii has new reasons to return to the barstool and shed those crocodile saurian tears as he awaits the verdict from fellow GOPasaurs on whether the Orange One will live to Speak another day. Those who cover his prized position at the head of the House Food Chain can barely suppress their eagerness to throw the long-suffering B. lachrymosii into the nearest volcano in his hour of weepy weakness.

Cold, clammy skin? Check. Beady little eyes? Check. Blood-drenched talons? Check. Velociraptor cantorii, whose Freon-like cold blood terrifies everyone in the drainage basin, is on the march. This venomous and vile creature is unconstrained by considerations of loyalty, happily sinking its fangs into friend, foe, or passerby if it will advance his reptilian objectives of world domination.

Cretaceous conservasaur Demintasaurus dementii has shuffled off his governmental coil for a position at the head of a "think tank", a surprising move for this dull-witted limbic-brained creature. Among GOPasaurs, thinking is considered a major fossil faux pas, but like all of his species, the lure of Vast Sums of Wealth prove all too tantalizing.

Archelon mcconnellii, stepping in to save the day as his orange colleague retreated to his underground wet bar grotto at the height of the Fossil Fiscal Follies, proved that, when the chips were down, you might as well break out the salsa, crack open a cold beer, and make the best of a difficult situation. Emerging from his deliberations with Pugilasaurus joebidenii looking little the worse for wear, A. mcconnelli shows that turtle tenacity that explains why his kind have endured over hundreds of millions of years as other GOPasaurs have fallen by the wayside.

Succumbing to extinction - but not without a fight - is Inflammasaurus allenwestii, whose hate-filled vocalizations will be remembered long after he has taken his place in the fossil record. Even by GOPasaurian standards, this vicious spewer of virulent venom was considered extreme. Paleo-pundits fear that we have not heard the last outburst from this caustic critter.

Votersaurs also bade a fossil farewell to Legitimasaurus toddakinii, whose antidiluvian grasp of reproductive biology was considered outdated even by Triassic colleagues. Scientific ignorance, a point of pride among male GOPasaurs, has its limits, and L. toddakinii delineated those limits conclusively. Fellow reproductive expert Giftfromgodasaurus mourdockii also reached the end of his evolutionary journey, not a moment too soon.

While not strictly speaking a GOPasaur, Whineasaurus liebermanii embodied enough egregious GOPasaur traits to warrant posthumous taxonomic reclassification. Loathed by Cretaceous colleagues on both sides of the aisle, this craven critter proves that paleo-party loyalty matters, even in pre-stone-age times.

It's off to the Tar Pits for Deadbeatasaurus joewalshii, proving that turning one's back on one's offspring while living large is considered Very Poor Form, even among carnivores. Dispensing marriage and child-rearing advice while living a fraudulent lifestyle? Priceless.

Despite his twisted pronouncements, Pledgeasaurus norquistii slid further into the Tar Pits of Oblivion as his minions puppets adherants agreed to demand more from the Onepercentasaurs. These hoarders of wealth, with their vast Caymanian holdings and complex tax avoidance schemes, spent the holidays curled up in a fetal position, weeping at the thought of parting with their dino-dollars.

Speaking of oblivion, the bombastic Bloviasaurus limbaughii has been relatively quiet (although, like a dormant volcano, future eruptions cannot be ruled out). No longer the paleo-powerhouse he once was, B. limbaughii has been passed by by the evolutionary process as his saurian sponsors view his extinction as a very real possibility in way less than geologic time.

As the 113th Congress is sworn in, look for more fossil fatalities as growing rifts within the GOPasaur ranks bring more dino-on-dino attacks. With power slipping from their undersized forelimbs, it's every critter for themselves. You'll want some paleo-popcorn and a cold beverage for the next installment! Let the backstabbing begin!

Poll

What's next for Boehnersaurus lachrymosii?

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| 14 votes | Vote | Results

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Reposted from Indigo Kalliope by cassandracarolina

[although 2013's not lookin' so hot either...]

Mayan forecasts of doom were a bust
Where's a prophecy people can trust?
If the world's gonna end
We will have to depend
On some accurate facts! That's a must!

Kim and Kanye expecting a child?
Those Kardashians should be exiled!
Reproducing at will
Is their primary skill
With celebrities they have beguiled

Poor John Boehner; there's not enough Scotch
To make up for his fiscal cliff botch
As he faces the day
Caucus in disarray
Eric Cantor's on speakership watch

Crazy weather: we freeze or we roast
Superstorms are eroding the coast
Weather Channel folks cheer
"Folks are tuning in here!
Our great ratings are reason to boast"

Football playoffs are finally set
NFL fans can now place their bet
Losing coaches are fired
And the winners admired
And the casualties aren't over yet

Despite ads that bombarded us all
Big retailers are crying "shortfall!"
There are dollars unspent!
Slacking shoppers: repent!
Off your asses, and off to the mall!

Freaked-out Kossacks cry "Obama sux!"
He'd sell out for a couple of bucks!
He's forgotten his vow!
He's a loser, and how!
We're all screwed like some poor sitting ducks!

Will we go off the cliff, as some hope?
Is this all just some more rope-a-dope?
While some here want to leap
Others say "what the [bleep]?!
Don't you realize some folks cannot cope?"

What does 2013 hold in store?
Economic collapse? Far-off war?
Just more gridlock and pain?
Things we just can't explain?
It's for certain: it won't be a bore!

Now it's your turn: please add to this list
Of the reasons this year won't be missed
And your hopes for next year
(And the things that you fear)
And the people who need to be dissed

Poll

What do you hate most about New Year's Eve?

7%1 votes
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53%7 votes
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7%1 votes
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| 13 votes | Vote | Results

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Reposted from Absurdity Today by IronicNews

We are back with the latest episode of Absurdity Today, formerly The Ironic News Report, with the independent news parody series hosted by political satirist Julianna Forlano. In this episode we cover Hostess selling its assets, vulture capitalism's reign of terror against Americans, the creeping surveillance state, the Lincoln movie's ending, and the end of Aspergers Syndrome. All in 2 minutes flat. Enjoy!

Discuss
Reposted from opinIANs by HoundDog

The Onion, a leading satirical publication branding itself as "America's Finest News Source," will soon be forced to cease and desist publication, in both print as well as Internet text and video. The newspaper, founded in 1988 by students at the University of Wisconsin, gained woldwide recognition as well as 7.5 million unique visitors to theonion.com each month, the Chicago Tribune reported in 2011.  But it seems lawmakers aren't always amused, because the federal government is set to force the "news" outlet to close.

Poll

Is the government right to close down The Onion?

90%168 votes
3%6 votes
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| 185 votes | Vote | Results

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