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Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, November 7, 2024
Note: A quick heads-up that there will be no C&J Monday. Back Tuesday after a weekend under intense klieg lights to profess that Donald Trump is my Lord and savior now and forever and anyone who disagrees will get pooped on, believe me, believe me LONG LIVE HANNBAL LECTER! —Mgt.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Veterans Day: 4
Days 'til the Atlanta Chili Cook Off: 9
Number of Boeing employees going back to work after their 7-week strike ended: 33,000
Number of Atlantic hurricanes that will have formed this season, including Rafael: 11
Expected time on Sunday that Rafael will hit the Louisiana coast if it maintains its current track: 1pm
Year-over-year increase in new home prices as of September: 3.4%
Number of Grammy nominations and wins, respectively, that Quincy Jones earned before he died Sunday at 91: 80 / 28
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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
So, fellow progressives, stop thinking about suicide or moving abroad.
Want to feel better? Eat a sour grape, then do something immediately, now, today. Figure out what you can do to help rescue the country—join something, send a little money to some group, call somewhere and offer to volunteer, find a politician you like at the local level and start helping him or her to move up. Think about how you can lend a hand to the amazing myriad efforts that will promptly break out to help the country recover from what it has done to itself. Now is the time. Don't mourn, organize.
—November 2004
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Rockin’ the dock...
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CHEERS to just another Thursday. A quick inventory: Partner of 31 years? Check. Haley, C&J's rescue lab mix of 12 years and pootie Fantom of 15? Check. Unruly squirrels on the porch roof? Squeak. Friends? Check. Job? Check. Health? Check. Residence in a state that voted 53-45% for Harris? Check. Ability to laugh at poop and fart jokes? Phhhhhh... (that was an SBD “check”). So...what else can I say? We keep on keepin’ on.
JEERS to the bottom line about Tuesday’s election result. There have been many wave elections throughout our nation’s history. 2024 saw the first weave election. And I can honestly say that I hope it’s the last.
CHEERS to a spot of good news. In states both red and blue, voters at least got seven ballot measures right:
Seven states passed ballot measures to expand or enshrine the right to an abortion: Arizona, Colorado, Maryland, Missouri, Montana, Nevada, and New York.
And since Lord Trump promised that he wouldn’t sign a national abortion ban into law, we peasants (check the bulletin board...we’re peasants now) don’t have to worry about a thing. What a happy country we live in now YES WE DO YES WE DO YES WE DO TRUMP KNOWS BEST AND HE SAYS WE DO!!! Sorry about that...just practicing to be a good little soldier.
P.S. More good news:
Her first job: mastering the art of shooting spitwads at Cruz.
JEERS to promises unkept. Sixty years ago today, back in 1962, Richard Nixon announced that he was leaving politics with the immortal words, "You won't have Nixon to kick around anymore." Relive the smarm…
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We did, in fact, have him to kick around some more. Then Ford kicked us by un-kicking him with a pardon. That was mean.
CHEERS to blessed silence. Can you hear it? That's the sound of no more campaign ads. Now we can get back to normalcy—ads for drugs, Medicare Advantage plans, reverse mortgages, and penis pills. Yee haw!
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Ten years ago in C&J: November 7, 2014
CHEERS to diversity between our ears. Researchers at Virginia Tech say they've discovered that there's a big difference between Democrats and Republicans when it comes to brains. The biggest difference: Democrats have them.
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That’s all I got for today. Have a tolerable Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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