George Bush not only touched the stove when he invaded Iraq, the damn fool sat on it. And now, four scorched-ass years later, the Bush Administration is learning to ask, "And then what?" That is why the White House, via Tony Snow, could be so breathlessly lame as to blame Bill Clinton for this mess. Did you see his big brown eyes in the headlights?
I did. So did everyone else in the whole damn world.
OK, Newt, let's say we blow up one of his dud Taepodong-2 missiles on the launch pad. Then what?
I'll tell you what, Kim Jong Il does just what his father did, that's what. He crosses the DMZ and it's Korean War II. Newt Gingrich -- the guy who coined the term "regime change" that first week after Sept. 11 -- thinks Kim Jong Il would never do such a thing because that would mean certain "regime change."
Newt Gingrich is as looney as Kim Jong Il's bouffant.
This is a man named as target No. 3 by George Bush in the 2002 State of the Union speech. He has his picture on the Post Office wall as one-third of the "Axis of Evil" and he's watching Saddam Hussein go down. This is a man who has blatantly and shamelessly broken his word time after time with the United States and his neighboring countries and then extorted money, electricity, food and medicine in order to go back and keep his word. This is a man who is desperate.
Would he do it? Why not? Why don't you think this crazy little poker player has some reason to believe he can't fight us to a stalemate just like his daddy did? Watching us struggle with 130,000 troops in Iraq, watching the Taliban regroup and surge in Afghanistan, watching us draw down troops everywhere else in the world to our heads above water in the Middle East .... why would he think this is such a bad gamble, especially if we start the shooting this time?
Why would he think the Chinese would not do exactly what they did in 1948 when American troops crossed the Yalu River. And the Russians, too. Why wouldn't he believe another invasion of South Korea would result, for North Korea, a return to the good old days.
Cold War II.
And then what?
Maybe Tehran would just use that as an opportunity to convert to Judaism. Or maybe not. Maybe instead they'd send a torrent of arms across the border into Afghanistan to the Taliban. And maybe it would be a good time to slip the leach off Muqtada al Sadr and his Shiite militias.
And then what? And then we're in a big fat world war with an all-volunteer military and emtpy recruiting office and three-quarters of the world so crazy pissed off at us that they're thinking it might not be such a bad thing if the United States of Texas, NASCAR and Rambo got its ass knocked down a notch or two.
Yeah, that's real good Newt. Regime change. Right, bring it on. Tell you what, why don't you go make a list of all the regimes you'd like to change, OK?
So now Sean Hannity, who interviewed Gingrich, is thinking, yeah! Kick some more dictator ass! And right on his heels is the wingnut bloggers, the rest of FOX, the A.M. yammerers and then, once there's something to filtch, Ann Coulter. All getting blood fever (the fear of which is probably the real reason we're in Iraq).
And then what?
George Bush and Karl, Condi, Don, Dick and all the brightest minds the Republicans can cobble together, find themselves caught between reality and the war-war wingnuts.
And then what?
And then they blame Bill Clinton. Because transparently lame as it is, that's all you can do when you have John Wayned yourself into such a tight little corner.
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