A week or three ago, I received an e-mail from a community member, whose name most of you would recognize. His wife is in a real jam with health problems, and they are having trouble finding the money to help her get healthy. He was, frankly, out of options, and turned to me, not knowing what else to do.
His wife is an intensely private person, so this appeal will need to be made anonymously. But trust me, you know and love this person, and this is a case of real need: it will take between $8,000 and $13,000 to bring her home safely.
Text of the appeal below the fold.
Please recommend this diary.
Update [2005-10-11 11:36:35 by pastordan]: A couple of people have asked about alternatives to Paypal. We're working on that. Shoot me an e-mail, and I'll let you know. Thanks for all the support so far!
Update [2005-10-11 16:19:52 by pastordan]: I am told that we've raise about $2400 so far, perhaps a little more. Thanks for all you've done, and keep it coming!
One of the hardest things is to feel powerless. Harder still, is to feel powerless to help someone you love. Someone who needs you. Someone you would do anything to help. And that's how I feel right now.
My wife is in a foreign country to have a series of surgeries we could not afford for her to have here in the U.S. -- and which fell between the cracks of our health insurance. It all started out well, but too many unexpected things went wrong, and now she lives in considerable fear. We thought she had enough money for the surgeries, but there was an unexpected emergency surgery; an auto accident; a slump in strength of the dollar against the local currency; credit cards are maxed. And much more. She now does not have near enough money to pay for the final procedure. The one without which, the whole effort will have been for nothing. Worse than nothing.
The final procedure needs to get done very soon. And as you might imagine, the doctors and hospitals need to get paid, and they run on a tight schedule. In this instance, the docs will offer a discount if she pays cash up front. The urgency is great, and the consequences of delay are serious.
I haven't got enough to be of much help, and there are no family or other sources to tap. So I turned to Pastordan for help. And he agreed to post my appeal, preserve my wife's privacy, and help me help her.
This gives us a fresh source of hope.
As someone who has enjoyed good health and been able to manage financially, even when times were tough, this situation underscores for me how vulnerable we all are; the way we all need each in other more than we realize; and in more ways than we can say when we find out. I am afraid I have more tears than words with which to tell the story. Writing this was much harder than I thought it would be. (I have edited this since the teary first draft.)
I will spare you our hair-raising realizations about the health care system in the U.S. for another time. We hope to be able to say something about it someday; maybe as a book. Or maybe we will put the whole episode behind us -- but try to take the lessons we have learned and make them useful in some other way. If she can complete her surgeries, (We have
great confidence in her doctors.) she will be fine and we can get on with our lives. Poor, but able to recover someday.
On a seeming side note, Pastordan, had a post the other day, that also brought out the tears. He has linked to a beautiful story about a Muslim American man, who spends some time talking with a homeless man who does windshields and who goes by the name Aslam. In the Muslim
tradition, the homeless and the mentally ill (who are often the same people), are people to not only be cared for, but listened to as people in a high spiritual state, and are often considered saints.
Where my wife is staying, shocking poverty is never far away. When I spoke with her on Friday, she told me about how the homeless live in her neighborhood and detailed some of the obstacles they face. And then she took me by surprise -- explaining how she routinely makes sandwiches for them. But I shouldn't have been surprised. She always knows the homeless in her neighborhood. And I love her for it.
Pastordan's post reminded me of her, as so many things do these days.
I know that her experience is changing her life, as it is mine. I don't know where it all will lead. Right now, all I can concentrate on is ensuring that she can have her final surgery. The consequences for her not having it, are dire.
Please help me help her. She is pretty much alone, except for me, and now, all of you.
You can make a donation via Pay Pal to the FundforHope
(FundForHope AT Gmail.com)
I will write a follow-up via Pastordan to let you know how it all works out.