Ok a few days back I made a post about how my wife and I are adopting a 3 month old baby girl. Since that time its been an emotional rollercoaster.. some good some bad, but now jsut when everything looks good..
The birthfather comes into the picture
Now, let me preface this.. I don't as a whole have any issues with men wanting to raise thier children. I think its a great thing..
The birthfather hasn't signed the papers yet.. and he keeps hemming and hawing so to speak.
The facts as we know them at this point: (From the Agency, HIS Lawyer, the DCF lawyer)
- The state of Florida has already decided hs is unfit to be a single parent, due to a combonation of factors.. multiple arrests of druken fighting, unable to keep steady employment for longer that 4 months ove rthe last 6 years, etc.
- Hes known about this for over 2 months.. that the baby would be given up for adoption.
- Hes said multiple times he was going to sign the papers.. now hes stalling.
- Hes told multiple people he DOESN'T want the baby to stay in Foster Care.
- Hes told multiple people that he knows he can't care for the baby.
- His mother, his lawyer, the lawyer for the Dept of Children and Familes, the birthmother, her mother all think he should sign
- He's stated taht he has no problems with my wife and I as a couple
No one can get a straight answer out of him about WHY he won't sign. The problem is of course this was all supposed to be finalized.. TOMORROW.
My wife and I had gotten our leave organized.. everything is ready..
Car seat? Check
Mirror to see baby? Check
Diapers, formula, bottles? Check x3
I mean we were set.. we GOT set cause everyone told us not to worry and this was going to happen..
He hasn't signed.
I'm angry.. and upset at the same time.
Now it doesn't mean he WON'T sign.. He may have signed tonight, his lawyer was going to go over everything ... AGAIN with him, pointing out that hes never going to get custody, and by NOT signing hes going to leave the child in the foster care system.
He may sign in the morning.. or at the court hearing tomorrow..
if he doesn't.. they are going to ask for a weeks delay.. and see if he does.
If he STILL doesn't..
My wfie and I may have to.. once again.. not have a family o our own.
We WANT children.. we can't have biological children.. that was kinda hard to get used to.. the worst part was that we have " unknown" infertility.. everything looks great on the 1001 tests we took.. and they never found a reason.
It just..sigh I'm jsut frustrated.. angry, sad.. all at once.