Joe Biden, You Can Get Rich Quick! (or pay for Cindy McCain's next RNC outfit)

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Thursday September 11, 2008 · 3:45 PM PDT

2008/09/11 · 15:45

Far too much, I realize, has been said about Caribou Barbie and her various scandals du jour, so this diary is (mostly) tongue-in-cheek: either financial advice or debate talking point for (I hope) the next vice president of the United States, Joe Biden. Joe--you need to (retroactively) adopt the travel (?) per diem philosophy of your esteemed opponent in the upcoming, Sarah "Full Cooperation" Palin--or ram it down her neck at the October 2 debate.

While the folks up north in Alaska grew frustrated with the Gov's jaunts back to Wasilla to the point of wearing "Where's Sarah?" buttons, Joe's constituents actually seem pleased with his ritual of returning home from his office every evening to his home (and home state). But I'm of a mind that just because Joe enjoys spending time reconnecting with family and those he represents, doesn't care to get too involved with the element that believes that hiring a former Abramoff associate qualifies you as a "maverick", and just because he would be qualified to assume the highest office in the land doesn't mean he should be poor.

If Senator Biden were to go back to the beginning of his Senate career, point out to the powers that be that he traveled home each day (and his opponent would have to bear out that he deserves remuneration: "She's entitled to it," said Palin spokeswoman Sharon Leighow), he could make a tidy bit of change. Patience, I'm a statistician, so these are "back of the envelope" calculations:

Amount Moosehuntress charged per day: $60.00
Number of days Senate has been in session*: 5458
Gives a total of: $327,480
*Since being sworn in in 1973, not including 2008--he's been busy this year.

Joe, not being a greedy sort (allowing for little things like international diplomatic missions and previous presidential campaigns) would probably let Uncle Sam keep the $27,480, and just make it an even $300K--a "sign", if this agnostic has ever seen one--almost exactly the amount Cindy McPoppin' Pills dropped for her little banana outfit up in Minnesota.

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