Paws for Palin

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Tuesday September 09, 2008 · 8:07 PM PDT

2008/09/09 · 20:07

Apparently the previous Governor of Alaska didn't do enough to appease Sarah Palin when he signed a bill allowing people to hunt down and kill wolves via shooting from airplanes. When she took office, Sarah decided to pay the people of Alaska to kill them.

I'm not a Peta member. I do love animals and wildlife. I despise cockroaches, and creepy crawling things most of the time. I do sob when I see Sarah MacLachlan on that commercial with the pitiful cats and dogs looking into the camera. It kills me. But I had to think a moment when I found out that Sarah "Barracuda" Palin had authorized legislation that would actually pay people to shoot wolves from airplanes in Alaska. Why would this be? I tried to envision droves of people coming in to the Alaska Game and Wildlife Department with bloody wolf paws in coolers (yes, people are paid per hind paw delivered) to pick up their $150 per-paw Palin bounty.

What did they do with the paws, I wondered? Does Sarah take them to a taxidermist and keep count so she can use them as trophies? Does she really see this as just another one of her many accomplishments as the Governor of Alaska? Or are they just thrown in the trash? What happens to the rest of the poor animal? Though Palin touts the goodness of Moose burgers, I doubt that wolf is on her menu. Or is it?

Since Palin charges the Alaskan people for the price to haul her family around with her, I wondered what her little girl would think of these bloody paws her Mom had requested. How would a parent explain that?

Fortunately, this bounty-hunting of wolves didn't go far. The state superior court ruled Palin's scheme as illegal use of bounty payments, which were outlawed in Alaska in 1984. Now I don't have to wonder about about the bloody wolf paws anymore.

If only the other worries I have about Palin would go away as easily...

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