OOH, Look at meeee...I'm a Republican and I like tax cuts and I'm all for responsible spending. OOH...lookit how we're all huddled together talking about responsible spending all of a sudden...look at how right we've been EVEN ONCE on economic issues, cuz Regan was sooo smart about economics, why look at how great our national unemployment was under Regan...
WHAAAAAA??? THAT can't be right. National unemployment over 10% during the Regan Administration? I don't remember THAAAaaaAT...the US Department of Labor has a liberal agenda just like public schools, the media, Colleges and Universities, science, scientists, Hollywood, video games, the Whole Internet, Nobel Laureates, the United Nations, the climate, and the rest of the world, therefore I'm going to make my own unbiased set of unemployment figures that I draw from Facts I Remember and I remember a minus sign in front of all these unemployment stats.
Unemployment under the Regan administration was
-10%
And Regan and Bush BOTH reduced the national debt
http://zfacts.com/...
WHAAAT? This can't be right. Says here they EXPANDED the national debt! Liberal bias. This chart is upside down. I KNOW because I was RIGHT THERE dragging my feet on ballooning deficits...when the president wanted to borrow money we didn't have and spend about a trillion of it on a made up war, I was at the forefront, on my knees, saying "NO! NO! Mr. President! We can't do this, this would be irresponsible! No no no no no! This feels so right, but it's so so wrong..." And when I had my moist lips firmly wrapped around his "economic policy," I hummed my dissent throughout.
So I know, I KNOW for a FACT there's no WAY we could have seen a constantly raised debt ceiling, year after year! Because I, John Frickin' Boehner and the rest of the Republican party were bravely, stalwartly guarding our long and glorious history of doing above and beyond jack shit for economic policy.
And while the Liberal media and Liberal world and Liberal facts howl in our ears like a chilling winter storm, we will march on! March on! Further and further into the colder and colder storm we definitely did not create. We will continue with policies we KNOW work. We KNOW because they've worked even once in the past. We'll march through this storm, despite the occasional setbacks of "Liberal" Prosperity offered by Liberals...
What?
You just want my drink order?
Fuck you. I'll take a Shirley Temple. This IS on The House right?
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