And I've barely touched the surface of the state's iceberg of wingnuttery, which would begin with a Legislature controlled by the Religious Right, banks, and the go-for-broke development industry (Charlie Keating went to prison, but his growth machine did not slow down):
Phoenix and its growth are the epitome of everything that is unsustainable and unhealthy about recent American real-estate development. As a Newsweek cover story from 1995 detailed, Phoenix sprawls across the flat desert landscape, requiring the consumption of ever-more gasoline to travel the ever-greater distances.
Then there's that fun Minutemen club along the border that is "protecting" us from brown people, while they murder little girls. And let's add to the list: a "marriage protection act" saving us from the gays; Grover Norquist's tax-cutting, program-destroying wet dream on steroids, resulting in a low-wage Wal-Mart economy; an executive office where the governor's chief of staff is a former lobbyist for the private prison industry, which gets $50 million from the federal stimulus, but she can't find $1.5 million for organ transplants; guns everywhere sold to anyone; ethnic studies bans in public schools and an upcoming attack on the 14th Amendment; and a lunatic gaggle of DC representatives that starts with Kyl and McCain and goes right down the looney tubes to Trent Franks and Ben Quayle. Barry Goldwater and Ev Mecham look like pikers compared to these vicious a-holes.
The Governor did appoint a commission to rebrand the state, following last year's boycotts and the loss of tourism revenue. Maybe that's it: "Arizona, Disneyland for Tea Party Patriots."
To help them out, I thought I'd visit their website and, being a long-time Phoenician, offer a few tips that don't show up there yet. First, Tea Party People, I'd suggest you have something a bit more detailed than this for a conference that's about to begin in about a month:
Friday, February 25, 2011
1 - 5 Breakout Sessions
7 - 9 General Session
Saturday, February 26, 2011
8 - 11 General Session
11 - 1 Breakout Sessions
1 - 3 General Sessions
3 - 6 Breakout Sessions
7 - 9 General Session
Sunday, February 27, 2011
8 - 9 Non Denominational Prayer Session
10 - 12 General Session (Potential Presidential Candidates Forum)
12 - 1 Straw Poll
1 - 2 Closing Session, Where Do We Go from Here?
I'm just sayin'. Maybe you could provide a wee bit more information than "General" and "Breakout." And you might get a "big name" wacko, not just: Dick Morris, Andrew Breitbart, Brent Bozell, Herman Cain, Congressman Louie Gohmert, Foster Friess, James Gwartney, Colin Hannah. Who are some of these people? Where's Palin, Bachmann, DeMint, Beck? (Okay, I'll grant you, Louie Gohmert passes the crazy test.)
Next, in the website section called "Exhibitors," you might actually list some. Same with the link called "Sponsorships" -- it might be nice to mention one, not just your own organization.
Finally, though, I want to congratulate you for the page called "About the Area," and provide a bit more information for your attendees.
The American Policy Summit will be held in this great southwestern city, born from the ruins of a former civilization, to celebrate the rebirth of American culture. We also wish to support the citizens of Arizona in their current political battles that carry so many national implications.
Thanks for helping with our "current political battles" that have "many national implications" because, you know, FAIR and other national nutjob organizations haven't helped enough already. And those "implications"? Yes, Arizona has been such a model for the country, being ranked 50th in just about every educational indicator, and having one of the nation's worst deficits and unemployment rates, that of course other states are just lining up to copy the Arizona prototype.
Thanks too for the nod to our heritage, but you left out some parts. Phoenix does sit where the Hohokam civilization existed about a thousand years ago. Our water delivery systems, which are partially built over the Hohokam canals, were the result of Democratic Senator Carl Hayden's 40-year effort to construct dams and aqueducts in the Southwest. When the Central Arizona Project passed in 1968, it was the largest federal appropriation ever for a single state project. In other words, the Phoenix you celebrate on your website, Tea People, would not exist without big federal investments.
I'm also glad to see your website has lots of pictures of Phoenix's new Convention Center, funded with hundreds of millions of dollars from taxpayers; you applaud our downtown baseball and basketball stadiums, funded by taxpayers; and you say nice things about the Valley's new light rail system, also funded by local taxpayers and federal subsidies -- an astounding success. Your DC leaders, naturally, want to do away with a lot of mass transit funding. And if you're coming to Phoenix you can't omit:
The arts offer the world-class Heard Museum, the Phoenix Art Museum and First Fridays Artwalk (a festival held every first Friday of the month).
These world-class facilities, the Heard and Phoenix Art Museum, are two of the area's most important economic engines, attracting tens of thousands of visitors and employing hundreds of people. Of course, the Governor's new budget slashes funding for the arts to dismal levels. These and other state museums also receive support from NEA and NEH, two federal agencies you'd like to dismantle. But, hey, let's celebrate them on our website! And let's not forget:
Phoenix is America’s fifth-largest city, but it retains the famous western landscape of mountains, deserts, cactus, and an occasional cowboy.
Yep, we "retain" our magnificent landscapes thanks in part to environmental groups that are constantly battling your scortched-earth development policies, not to mention help from city and state parks agencies, two more government programs that are being dismantled here by Republicans. And while we're talking parks, if you have time, Tea Baggers, don't forget to drive north to the Grand Canyon, if your Party does not do away with the National Park Service before February. When T. Roosevelt set aside that wonderful site as a National Monument in 1908, Arizona's Republican governor and the state's chambers of commerce went bananas, because his act put an end to the "free market" exploitation your website champions. Now that the Grand Canyon is among the nation's biggest economic drivers, how do you think it would've worked out if we had followed your "limited government" plan?
Finally, I'm so pleased to see in BIG BOLD letters that you urge conference attendees to visit Cheuvront's Restaurant & Wine Bar, a trendy facility owned by openly gay Democratic State Legislator Ken Cheuvront. You'll feel right at home.
I can see a lot of work went into your website, Tea People. I hope I've helped.
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