Wisconsin Transparency Force (W.T.F.) requests your assistance in purchasing a pair of fireproof pants for the Governor of Wisconsin, Scott Walker.
Due to his penchant for fabricating events that never occurred and his numerous
"Pants on Fire" ratings from Politifact, we the people of W.T.F. feel certain that Scott Walker's trousers are in constant danger of immolation.
Celebrate
Festivus with a
donation to the #FireProofPantsForScottWalker fund! We’re sure the Guv will be hugely appreciative when we publicly present the #AsbestosPants (made from the very best locally-sourced
asbestos from the Penokee Hills*).
#FireProofPants for Guv Walker only cost 12500 pennies. A bargain! Donate some pennies today!
In addition, W.T.F. would like to draw your attention to a second problem.
There are an untold number of Wisconsin children who will not receive gifts this year because of a fundraising letter sent by Scott Walker’s campaign. In that notorious letter, readers were asked to NOT give toys to their children and were asked to INSTEAD give money to Scott Walker’s campaign fund!
In light of these unfortunate circumstances, we ask that you help provide children with toys by donating to
Santas Without Chimneys.
*OK, as you might have guessed, the pants aren't really made from
Penokee Hills asbestos. But they're still really cool - actual Firefighter Proximity Pants.
See here for details.