You know, this is such a big country that it was almost a given that some tea partying schoolteacher, somewhere would look at Rush Limbaugh's creepy self-fan-fiction children's books and tell themselves "yes, this is clearly something I should be teaching my third grade class." And if even one tea partying schoolteacher somewhere in America thought such a thing, it's similarly inevitable that they'd wind up on Rush Limbaugh's botulism-laced radio show
so that he could brag about it.
Her husband alerted her to the children's title, Rush Revere and the Brave Pilgrims: Time Travel Adventures With Brave Americans. She read it immediately. "And I said, 'Okay, how am I gonna incorporate this book into the classroom?' because the kids need to hear it," she explained during a Wednesday call to Rush Limbaugh's program. "They need to read this book." [...]
At this point, the caller got cut off for a moment, and Limbaugh took the opportunity to read the text of the author's note that she used to introduce the Civil War.
(Short version of that "author's note": Slavery ended because America was the bestest country ever so shut up.)
For those of you blessedly unfamiliar with Rush Limbaugh's children's books, they feature Rush Limbaugh himself playing the role of a brave Paul Revere-ish fellow who visits various brave moments in brave American history with the help of his time-traveling talking horse who apparently farts rainbow-colored wormholes or something. Yes, Rush Limbaugh's head is illustrated in the books as being about the size as a whiskey barrel—at least they got that part right.
This sort of attention bodes well for my own new series of children's books, Hunter and the Time-Traveling Possum Go Through American History Heckling Rush Limbaugh, but is otherwise probably just a sign of America's continued intellectual decline.
