
After the debate, she bravely ran away.
So this happened.
During a debate for the 10th Congressional District with a Democratic challenger Wednesday, Virginia Republican congressional candidate Barbara Comstock said that the government can secure the border by tracking immigrants in a similar fashion to how the shipping company FedEx tracks packages.
“I think immigration should be done by legislation, not executive action. I think first and foremost, we need to stop playing politics with this and secure the borders,” Comstock said at the debate against Democratic challenger John Foust. “Fedex can track packages coming in here all the time; we can track people who are coming into the country. And we can do that right.”
There are of course several reasons why FedEx may be more able to track "packages" than any government is able to track people; chief among them is that packages do not have feet. It is even standard FedEx policy that they will not ship a package that does have feet. I believe it is one of the boxes you have to check on the form:
Does this package have feet? If you answer in the affirmative FedEx will gently tell you that they cannot help you send a package that has feet, because their rigorous system of shipping inanimate objects that need no food, or water, or oxygen, and which cannot get up on their little package feet and step out of their designated carrying bin will not work in the more complex case of
this package indeed has feet.
All that is in addition to the obvious ick factor of a wannabe member of Congress equating human immigrants and refugees to cardboard boxes needing to be sorted. So we've got the part where a candidate for Congress blithely dismisses the humanity of humans that refuse to stay in their designated carrying bins, and the part where even if you overlook the first part, the pronouncement seems to show a rather remarkable lack of understanding as to what the problem she is trying to solve actually is. No, how the shipping company FedEx tracks packages actually tells us very little about how we could most effectively secure our borders, at least not until every last human on Earth is implanted with an RFID Mark o' The Beast 2.0 chip so that we keep track of them. That's probably still a good ways off, though.
Again we see why Congress seems unable to solve or even grasp their own stated most-pressing problems. This week has seen the House committee in charge of "science" make raging fools of themselves over "wobble" and what happens when you melt ice cubes; now the person who demands our borders be made more secure seems to believe the answer is to build a large warehouse that extends from California to Texas (forget Canada, nobody ever gives a damn about Canada) and tell all potential immigrants to conduct themselves as if they were each a box of fresh new socks.
This is why we can't have nice things, America. This right here.