A growing number of Rightwingy-dingies, including some with star power, such as talk-show hosts and radio personalities, have actually been telling their fans that Donald Trump is “God's Anointed Choice For President.” That’s right. God is voting for Trump, even though God is likely not registered to do so.
Even the Zombie Maiden of the Right, Ann Coulter, had released her latest “white America” book, “In Trump We Trust,” attempting to present him as the Savior of the World.
No laughing matter, although it’s difficult typing this with a straight face, but this “Anointed One” idea is entirely true and has reached Mainstream America with pious nods and blessings from the Walnut Gallery of American politics.
Even the admired [RW admiration] and much-imitated Quack Dynasty star, Phil Robertson, with his biblical beard hanging from his lips like tree moss and covering most of his face had declared at the Values Voter Summit in September that Trump should be publicly baptized... by none other than Robertson himself, who claims such an act will galvanize the Right and cause a mass entry of progressives to insane asylums across the country.
Robertson says such an event would get “God on our side.” (You can watch the video here.)
In said video you will hear the Most Holy Quack Dynasty star tell how he had a vision while [crapping in the woods] by the river and scrawled a cross on his hand and “The Lort” revealed Trump’s Jesus-ship. Robertson says, “... evangelicals will swarm (Trump) like a mighty thrall,” which is surely like flies swarm a fresh cow pie.
Okay. This Quack Dynasty Chicken Vent scribbled some silly stuff on his hand and thought he had a revelation? And thinks the Great God of the Universe would be happy with Trump if only Trump would be sprinkled with water and made into a frogging Christian. WTF????
It brings to mind the exchange between King Arthur and Dennis the Peasant in Monty Python’s “Holy Grail,” when the peasant asked how Arthur became king:
Arthur: The Lady of the Lake-- her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite,
held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by
divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why
I am your king!
Dennis: Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords
is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power
derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some -- farcical
Arthur: (yelling) BE QUIET!
Dennis: You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some
watery tart threw a sword at you!
Arthur: (coming forward and grabbing Dennis) Shut UP!
Dennis: I mean, if I went 'round, saying I was an emperor, just because some moistened bink had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!
Put them ALL away! Put them wot smell of elderberries out in the stables! This is total madness, yes? Can they really believe this?
Aye!!!!!!! They dooooooooo, I wail in my pained confusion. They do.
How many millions of Americans believe Trump has something to do with Divine Plots? How many believe in the likes of RW pundits who spew copious amounts of such ridiculous watery diarrhea that it could drown a nation? WHY??? I have to -- nay, I NEED to know why!
Religious leaders in this macabre farce claim this: because Trump is vying for the position of [dictator] POTUS Number 45, those Holy Folk who suck all sorts of important prophecies [that never existed] from the bible, say that Isaiah 45 somehow proves that Trump is ordained by God to be like Cyrus the Great [who took over half the known world in 500 or so BC. They forget to mention that Cyrus the Great respected the customs and religions of the lands he conquered, and had nothing to do with Christianity and has been dead and gone for centuries. Nevermind.]
Radio host Laurie Roth, rightwingy-dingy, sums up how prophets are [visiting Colorado and smoking dope] and have “...awakened and given visions and words from God as to who would become President. They were all told that Donald Trump was God’s anointed choice for President. He would be elected in a landslide and put America back on top in many areas, including spiritually, economically, as a worldwide energy source and power.”
Right. Okay, I’m on that bandwagon. They inspired me to deface the Italian Renaissance painting above – apologies to Andrea del Verrocchio.