As a white male, I’ve made an effort to recognize when I’ve benefitted from white male privilege. Even with my best intentions though, privilege is so ubiquitous that I sometimes don’t see it. Tim Wise suggested that we are so conditioned to it that we don’t think about it for the same reason fish don’t think about water. I would say that the pervasive nature of air and gravity might explain why humans don’t think much about air or gravity. So it is with white male privilege. But, if air or gravity were taken from us or even made available differently, you can bet we would notice and probably complain loudly. An even stronger, yet more subtle and discomfiting example is the fact that most people reading this would assume that the pronouns “we” and “us” means white males.
So, while some people acknowledge white privilege, others don’t. Those that don’t think white privilege is a thing, tend to get upset when there are changes in the playing field. I’m going to try to expand understanding of white privilege and attempt to illustrate why equality feels like oppression when you’re used to privilege. To do so, I’m going to tell a story about two brothers.
These two brothers are very much alike. They are so close in age that people think they are twins. They are, let’s say, five and six years old. They both live with their natural parents, they have similar interests, and they are treated equally. Some would say too equally. When Christmas comes, they receive identical toys and open their presents at the same time. When they go to birthday parties, the hosts give presents to all the attendees. When their own birthdays come, they both receive identical presents regardless of which brother is celebrating his birthday.
Remember, none of this is about merit. All the celebrations and gifts described above are merely accidents of birth and proximity. Now, let’s say that all changed. Let’s say the parents who hosted birthday parties quit giving presents to the attendees. Let’s say that the kids had to take turns opening gifts at Christmas. And, let’s say that the two brothers no longer got identical presents regardless of whose birthday was being celebrated. They’re still being treated equally but they would perceive some loss those first few times. They would likely feel like they were being treated unequally.
What do you think happens when these kids grow up and someone they work with receives a bonus or a promotion? They will feel cheated. They will ask, “Where’s mine?” Even though they had the same opportunities for advancement and rewards as everybody else, they will be resentful whenever someone else is rewarded.
This is the insidious nature of white privilege. In the past, the white male, especially, only had to work hard. The Horatio Alger myth of rags to riches was ingrained into our psyches, forgetting that these values were based on works of fiction. White males weren’t aware of people of color who also worked hard who never advanced. So, we just assumed all of our own success was based on merit. Sure, we worked hard. No one is taking that away. And it’s unlikely that we would have succeeded without hard work. We’re just unaware of how hard people from other backgrounds have to work to get the same rewards. And when those people begin to get those rewards in an unequal system that we always wrongly perceived as egalitarian, we get resentful. Get over it. Celebrate your successes and celebrate the successes of others. A rising tide really does float all boats.