Jimmy Kimmel used his show to discuss Tuesday’s events—specifically, Donald Trump’s whirlwind of a white supremacist’s dream press conference. After showing some clips of Donald Trump saying that there were some “very fine people” on both sides, Kimmel quickly showed a clip of the tiki torch dickheads from the other night, chanting “Jews will not replace us!”
Kimmel: So here's the thing. If you're with a group of people and they're chanting things like "Jews will not replace us" and you don't immediately leave that group, you are not a very fine person.
After showing some more of the Trump car crash press conference, Kimmel addressed the Trump voter directly.
Kimmel:
I want to speak to those of you who voted for Donald Trump. And first of all, I want to say I get it. I actually do. You're unhappy with the way things were going. You wanted someone to come in and shake things up. You didn't want business as usual. Nothing ever seems to get done. It's always the same. These candidates make a lot of promises that go nowhere. It happens over and over again. And you're sick of it and so this guy shows up riding down a golden escalator. He's not part of the political establishment. In fact, he's the opposite of that. He's a billionaire. Maybe. He's written books. He's not politically correct. He's not even correct usually. He talks tough. He wants to drain the swamp. Sometimes he can be funny. He rips into his opponents in a way politicians never do, have never done before and you thought, you know what? This guy's different and that's what I want. different. Let's roll the dice, let's get him in there, have him run the country like a business. Cut the dead weight, toughen everyone up. Let's shake this etch-a-sketch hard and start over. So you vote for him. You pick him over Jeb Bush and Ted Cruz and John Kasich and a dozen other republicans whose names we forgot, and ultimately he beats them. He strolls in, he beats all of these guys. These guys who have been in politics forever. And then he beats the ultimate political insider, Hillary Clinton, a woman who's been running for office -- a woman who ran for president of her mother's uterus in the womb. Forever.
He beats her. Everyone said he couldn't. Everyone said he wouldn't, but he did. And it's exciting because this is your guy. You picked a horse like 35-1 and somehow it paid off. So now he's the president. And it starts off okay. Meets with President Obama and they seem to have a nice conversation. Then he moves into the White House.
Right off the bat he's angry at the media for reporting the crowd at his inauguration was smaller than he thought it was. Which was weird but not important really. And he claimed and stopped raining when he was speaking at his inaugural address, which everyone could see it was raining, but okay, it was his first week. You give him a break.
So he gets in there, hires his daughter. He hires his son-in-law. Demands an investigation of voter fraud even though he won the election. He calls the prime minister of Australia and hangs up on him. He won't shake Angela Merkel's hand. He doesn't know Frederick Douglass isn't alive. He claims he can't release his tax returns because they're under audit, then says he's not going to release them at all. He signs a ban on Muslims that he claims isn't a ban on Muslims. He compliments the president of the Philippines for murdering drug addicts. Hours after a terror attack in London he starts a fight with their mayor. After criticizing Obama for playing golf. He plays golf every weekend. He accidentally shares classified intelligence with the Russians. He tweets a typo at midnight, then wakes up and claims it was a secret message. He praises Jim Comey in October, calls him a coward in June. He fires him. He lashes out at his own Attorney General for recusing himself from an investigation. He hires the mooch, he fires the mooch. He bans the transgender in the military without telling anyone in the military he's doing it. He plays chicken with Kim Jong Un. and that's just some of the list. If I went through all of it, it would be longer than the menu at the Cheesecake Factory.
It would be huge.
It’s a late night show and Kimmel ends with an idea to make Trump “king” so that he can just stand on his balcony with no power, wearing a crown and leaving us all alone—I’d prefer putting steel handcuffs on Trump and telling him they were the new style of “crown.”
