I posted this morning and did not see the many responses until late tonight; I’m sorry for not engaging in the thread in real time! Thank you for the really insightful comments and for the additions:
9. “You have to pick your battles.” Women of color, LGBTQ folks of color and so many others do not get to choose which form of oppression they will face, resist or survive on any given day. We must navigate it all concurrently, and white people must do so, as well. Yes, it is exhausting just thinking about all of it, so living it and, in many instances, thriving despite it, is an accomplishment worthy of honoring by not trying to make the mere thought or discussion of it easier for yourself.
10. "But things have improved so much! Can't you celebrate that instead of always pointing out something else?" People of color are the first to celebrate their culture, history and successes; ironically, such celebrations often are pinpointed as “racist” or “separatist” by white Americans, too. People of color don’t get to see only the sunny side of life because the daily realities of hate create real obstacles to navigate. So white people cannot choose to only see the sunny side of our multicultural society since it is only their awareness and activism that can shut down the members of their community that are creating the toxicity for people of color.