Respecting disabled people is, unfortunately, something of a final frontier when it comes to the too-slowly evolving culture of kindness and respect that so many of us are fighting for. Racism, sexism, and homophobia are biases that most Americans reject as unacceptable, but somehow, disrespecting the disabled isn’t something that sparks widespread criticism, or even gentle nudging toward betterment. When it comes to representation in media, it’s an even sadder state. Beyond a president who mocked a disabled journalist during the election campaign, we still see prevalent usage of words like “crippled” and “paralyzed” when we mean anything but.
It’s this harsh climate—the margins where so many disabled folks have been forced for far too long—that brings us #AbledsAreWeird, a hashtag created by disability activist Imani Barbarin on Friday. The stories told as the hashtag quickly climbed Twitter’s trending list are both startling in their cruelty and shocking in their frequency. Microaggressions are too real, and the able-bodied are hurling them at the disabled community with far too much regularity.
Let’s go to the tweets and learn a thing. Chances are, we can all do better when it comes to respecting our disabled friends and neighbors.
It all started with a “helpful” experience that Barbarin, who uses crutches, still thinks of often.
Participation took off quickly, and commonalities soon emerged. Let’s start with the supposedly “positive” trends that are actually unbearable.
First up: The people who are just so gosh-darned touched by the strength of disabled people, they cannot contain themselves.
Next: Those who can’t help but be forcibly helpful without being asked—often after being told their help was unneeded.
Then, enter the Prayer Warriors.
Then, there are those who can’t contain their curiosity.
In today’s social media world, there’s a new category rising in popularity: the Camera Operator.
Which leads us right into the odd category of Folks Who Wish They Were Disabled For Extremely Questionable Reasons.
The inverse to the “inspiration” gang is likely the “devastation” posse.
Don’t pet service dogs. Ever.
Don’t be cruel. To anyone, but especially toward disabled people who often can’t fend off such attacks.
There’s a special place in hell for people like this.
Ignorance and a lack of consideration also makes life harder for disabled people.
A weird pattern also emerged where people judge disabled books by their young covers.
That also supports the additional judgments that those with invisible disabilities face.
Lots of people have unsolicited (and often useless) advice.
News alert: Nobody cares what you believe about someone else’s abilities.
The desexualization of disabled people is appalling.
The “bright-siders” hurt more than they help.
No, you can’t try on someone’s disability. Stop asking.
Even if you try someone’s disability on in your mind, keep your thoughts to yourself.
Don’t test people’s diagnoses. Odds are, you’re not a doctor.
There are the people who are so unsettled by a disabled person that they won’t rest until the disabled person is also uncomfortable.
Amputees face unique reactions.
Then there are the ignorant assumptions.
One startling trend emerged from just the first 15 hours of the hashtag.
Some people aren’t ready for the responses they’ll get from disabled people.
Especially when they actively “other” the creator of the #AbledsAreWeird hashtag herself.
The countless conversations sparked by the hashtag (and others started by Barbarin in the past) are illuminating and worth your time. If you learned anything here, you’ll be delighted by the additional education that awaits you on Twitter.