William Southold | Opinion Columnist |The Southold Report
“Speaking fiction to power one story at a time.”
About that tape of President Trump’s conversation with Ukrainian President Volodomyr Zelensky which Trump describes as “perfectly fine and routine”, even “beautiful”. Putting aside the question of the impeachment worthiness of it, which I think is evident, there is a “cringe worthy” aspect to it that is also evident, and comes forth in the partial, slightly garbled, section of that conversation that CNS has obtained.
See what you think:
Trump: Vlody, come on now. I’ve promised you rockets you won’t even believe, and I’ve promised I’ll send anti rocket rockets that can knock down anything in the sky, believe me. What more do you want?
Zelensky: Yes. They will be most helpful. But the investigation is done. They found nothing.
Trump: But it’s worth another look, right? How about this? When you’re in New York at that UN thing, I’ll take you over to the Friar’s Club. The Friar’s club, Vlody! You’re a comedian, or you used to be. Never as big a star as me. Did you know they roasted me! Back in . . . I forget exactly when it was but it was a blast! They love me over there! I’m the biggest entertainer they ever roasted! They love me. I’ll introduce you around. You’ll love it, I can tell you that.
Zelensky: At the UN, we will be fairly busy in meeting other world . . .
Trump: I’m a star, I tell you! They love me! I’ll tell them to roast you! Wouldn't you love that? A little known Ukrainian comedian roasted by the Friar’s Club! We’re talking first rate! Top of the line roasting! I'll get you comedians so big that you've never met. That would be something!
At this point the rest of the conversation becomes unintelligible, we are sad to say.
For many voters, Trump is running on dual tracks as an unprecedented norm/law breaker, while also maintaining his status as a self bloated bore. This tape, if heard in its entirety, would bear this out conclusively.
But take heart Trumpsters. Even if your man is impeached, he’s got Rudy in his corner. Nothing like a Giuliani Gobbledygook Defense to back him up. Whitey Bulger’s son? Check it out on Fox News Sunday.
Central News Service, proudly bringing you the fakest news anywhere, featuring our very own Pulitzer Prize winning Fake Newsman, William Southold
(CNS Disclaimer: Mr. Southold has in no way won the Pulitzer Prize.)