I wrote these two small vignettes in 1993. At the time I was an IRC (Internet Relay Chat) addict. They may be out of order. I can’t say for sure.
I sometimes do suicide prevention/counseling on IRC. I've done about 15 suicide watches in the past 2 years. If you have a friend who is suicidal, the most important thing is to get them through one more day. Don't try to solve all of their problems...going through the problems may cause more depression. Just get them through until tomorrow.
I try to point out that suicide will still be an option tomorrow...there is really no hurry to do it. Life changes. Normally, for a suicidal person, the changes in a day or two are for the better.
I was coaxed on one occasion to give my "approval" to someone's possible suicide. It is, after all, her life. It was the most painful thing I have ever done. When she turned up on IRC a few days later feeling better, I was much relieved. In control of her own life, she found that she couldn't do it at the time. This was the fourth time I had been through this stage with her. I don't know what will happen if she becomes suicidal again.
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I just got off IRC, where I had a very depressing chat about death with a suicidal friend. I've been online to talk her out of committing suicide 3 times in the past year and a half. I guess I have run out of things to say to her.
She's a transsexual woman who lives in England, where it's almost illegal to be transsexual (they cannot marry either sex and can be arrested for claiming to be other than the sex on their birth certificate), so I can't visit her, and she doesn't want me to call, even if I could afford it. She also has Krohn's disease, so she can't afford to move away from England and give up her medical coverage for that condition.
I'm afraid that this time I sort of gave her permission to do it. She is in so much pain and heartache that it was pointless for me to try and talk her into surviving. I think she really wanted my approval of her chosen path. I didn't come right out and do that, but I came close.
I don't know if I will be hearing from her again.